Rocking the Stars
by thatonedimstar
Summary: After Annona Varesto, Princess of Velaris, aided in winning the war against Hybern, she took a deadly shot that not even her Fae body could heal her from. Late one night, she died. Though she was soon resurrected by an ethereal entity and has been having very vivid dreams and visions of a different world. Are the visions trying to tell her something, or is she just crazy?
1. Chapter One -- Prologue

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* * *

"…okay? She is not okay! Have you seen her? She so pale, and you, in your right mind, will say that she is fine?" the male voice, one so very foreign yet familiar at the same time, reached her ears.

"She—She will be fine," a weak female voice said, "I'm not even her main healer. You should wait for Madja, she will be able to asses Annona better than I ever could."

"So now you're admitting that she isn't fine." the male voice said, rough and rolling, rumbling over her bones.

"I—No, I didn't…" the woman said, her voice trailing off. An opening door sounded followed by some footsteps.

"Cass, come on, leave the poor woman alone." a different, more sensual voice said. A relieved sigh sounded from the woman followed by quick steps as she left the room.

Pain was constant and throbbing throughout her whole body. Her legs ached, her head ached, her chest ached with every heaving breath. It took everything to stop from calling out or wailing in pain, begging for it to stop.

"Do you even see her, Rhys." the rough male voice said, but this time his voice was weak and soft. "She is wasting away. Yesterday, she had color, her lips weren't chapped, and her breathing was somewhat even. Now, she is hardly drawing any sort of breath and looks like she is going to pass at any moment."

Now that he said it, she could feel how utterly weak she was, how dry her mouth was, how painfully slow her breaths came. Even though that one—Cass—mentioned that she was close to death, she wasn't afraid.

"If she does, then the least you could do is be at her side and comfort her, make sure that she isn't alone when she passes over." the other male voice said, now more solemn than before. She was going to die, and these two males, they were here to look after her. To help her pass over and to make sure she wasn't alone.

She wanted to know what males would come to help her, to look after her as she died. So pulling all of her strength into opening her eyes, she managed to crack them open, just enough to see the room around her and the two males in it.

She was in an extravagant bedroom with gold gilding the walls and high ceilings covered in multiple colored billowing fabrics. She was laying on top of a large bed with heavy duvets layered on top of her. She was being cared for, whoever she was, she truly meant something to these two. And the males…

They were both winged and one of them had violet eyes and short black hair, and the other winged male was facing away, his shoulders tense. The violet-eyed male instantly looked to her, and gestured with his chin to her, glancing back at the other winged male. He spun around and her heart missed a beat when she saw him.

He was gorgeous despite the hollowness in his brown eyes and the mess of brown hair pinned atop his head in a bun. She didn't know what to think of him, to think of the sharp jawline and the worry etched frown.

She blinked and he was crouched in front of her and that violet-eyed male was nowhere to be seen. He took her hand and pulled it to his lips and kissed her knuckles. All she could see was how pale her hand was.

"I'm here," he said, his voice so, so soft. "It's okay," He swallowed. "if you don't—can't—hold on anymore. I will learn to move on, I will be okay." She could tell that he wouldn't ever be able to move on from this, whatever he was to her. She was something to him, she mattered to him. And just for that, she didn't want to die. No—the slight glint in his eyes that she had seen was joy, just for a split second, at seeing her eyes open.

"You know," he started, her eyes became too heavy to keep open, but she stayed conscious, only to hear his voice. "we won the war. The King of Hybern is dead and the Cauldron is nullified, all thanks to you." He went on as if he stopped, she would disappear on him. "You gave Amren enough time to swing in and finish everything. I don't think it would've ended as well as it did if you weren't there." She could hear the strain in his voice, tell that it was anything but a good outcome when losing her was the cost.

Her breath slowed and it came harder and harder to draw any sort of breath. Even though she tried to hold on to the grasp of the world, she was falling into a warm and dark place. "Cauldron save you." He choked on a sob but pushed on. "Mother hold you. Pass through the gates, and smell that immortal land of milk and honey. Fear no evil. Feel no pain. Go, and enter eternity."

Opening her eyes again, she reached her hand up, no matter how horrible the pain was, and rested it on his chin. He stilled, not even daring to take a breath too deep. Silent tears streamed freely down his cheeks, his mouth set in a white line to suppress his sobs.

"I–" she started, her voice rough and dry. "I love you,"

He shook, suppressing a sob. "I love you too,"

Her hand fell away from his face when taking a breath became impossible, just as the world around her faded to black, an earth-shattering howl came out of the male that shook the very ground beneath them. A sound filled with so much emotion and sorrow that anyone who heard it would know that someone important has passed, that a soul so precious to so many has left this earth.

* * *

Fields of hissing and sighing grass swayed in the breeze spread as far as the eye could see. Turning on the spot, she looked around her to see mountains reaching up to the sky like hands reaching to feel the soft light of the sun, going so high that snow still crested the top despite the warmth. She took one step forward out of pure shock and confusion. As if the step triggered it, the strong scent of sweet grass wrapped around her, the smell of many flowers accompanying it, too many to pick out and label.

The warmth in the air beckoned her to lay down in the plush and vibrant grass, content to spend the rest of her life right here.

Looking up at the mountains, a twang of similarity rang through her. Three peaked mountains, the middle one the tallest. They seemed to glow with an ethereal presence, ever watching over her.

Looking down at her self, she noticed the long deep green gown made purely of flowing gossamer thin enough not to suffocate her in the heat. A band of gold hugged her waist, giving the material some sort of shape around her supple body.

"Nona!" a voice called out to her, at first it was nothing but a whisper, but then it grew into an all out call. Cassian. Cassian was calling out to her.

Turning around to where the voice came from, a cottage that wasn't there before appeared in the field in front of her. It was made out of weather-worn wood that looked like it has seen better days. Jutting out of the top was a rock chimney, the top covered in black soot. A dirt path in front of the cottage showed that it had been there for a while. And standing in the door...

Cassian stood there, in his Illyrian armor on as always but he wasn't wearing any weapons. He smiled and waved at her, his black hair brushing at his shoulders and his brown eyes lit up with joy; a joy that was reflected in his smile.

"Serena is hungry, and dad doesn't have the parts to feed her," he called, and that's when she heard the wailing of a babe coming from inside the small cottage.

She couldn't help the smile that reached her lips as she nodded at him. "I'll be there in a moment."

Cassian nodded and went back into the cottage, leaving the door open. She looked over her shoulder to look at the mountains and could've sworn she saw three stars glowing over the tallest peak despite the bright, cloudless day then started back on her way to the cottage.

Walking through the entrance, she saw Cassian sitting on the singular couch, a small babe wrapped in cream-colored silk in his arms, completely calm despite the tears she was shedding moments before. He looked up at her and she could see the kindness in his hazel eyes, the only time he had that softness was when he was looking at her or their daughter.

"She's beautiful," he said, looking back down at Serena as she grabbed onto her father's finger. "But not as beautiful as you," He looked back up at her and she couldn't help the warmth that grew on her cheeks.

"Thank you," she said, moving further into the coolness of the house.

"I'm still way more beautiful than you, though," he said, just as she sat down. With a wild grin on both of their faces, she took Serena out of his arms and kissed him on his cheek.

"I would be a fool to not agree with you on that," she said. He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close, resting his chin on her shoulder as he looked down at the babe.

Serena couldn't be any older than six months and despite her father being full Illyrian, she didn't have any wings, though she did have the dark hair that was largely contrasted to her mother's golden locks. Even though she didn't get her mother's hair, she had her eyes. Beautiful, shining green eyes, gold speckled through them.

The smile faded away from her lips and Cassian pulled away to inspect her face, his eyebrows furrowed. "What's wrong, Annona?"

Annona looked up at Cassian and swallowed at the worry that was in eyes. "Shouldn't you be out working? Surely Rhys has something for you to do, going up to the Illyrian camps to make sure the females are training, going through some report?"

He cocked his head and moved his hand to touch her bare shoulder, the callouses scraping against her skin. "Don't you remember, I retired decades ago so I could be with you. We can go see him if you want to." Again, that worry flashed across his face, his eyebrows furrowing more. "Should I call in a healer?"

She shook her head, looking down at her daughter. "No—no, everything is perfect." That was the thing, everything was perfect. There was no war to prepare for, no report needed to be read, no meeting to attend.

And where was Velaris? It wasn't that she didn't love this, love having enough time to sit on a couch next to her husband, their child in her arms, listening to chirping birds and the hissing of the grass.

But she also missed her friends. She missed Mor, the way they would shop for hours every week, buying so many clothes that they would never wear the same thing twice. She missed Azriel, how much of quiet reassurance he was, how he was always there when her husband was called away to do something. She missed Amren, how that woman hogged every fine jewel like her life depended on it. She missed her High Lord, how he had welcomed her into his family as if she had been there the whole time. And her new High Lady, how she was so compassionate and kind despite everything she had been through.

The family she had sacrificed herself for; the family she had laid her life down for and had gladly died for.

She had died, she had lost her life protecting her family, and now she was dead. That's what this was, this was the Afterlife. She didn't believe it. Even though the Day Court claimed to have information on mostly everything, what happened after death was still a large mystery. Even after High Lady Feyre had died, she hadn't really died. She was still in that world, still clinging onto her life force—clinging onto Rhys. Annona on the other hand…

She had made it to this other world. She had seen what was to happen after she died. Even with that knowledge, knowing that this was her Afterlife, that this was where she was to spend the rest of eternity, she didn't want it.

She had left her home, left all of her friends and responsibilities, only to come to a place that should be a place of pure bliss. But all she could think of is that she'd left her husband—Cassian. She had left him to mourn and hurt only to be given this perfect life. She didn't find it fair.

"You're too pale, I'm calling in a healer," Cassian said and walked over to the cluttered dining table to write a letter. Not her Cassian, she told herself, this Cassian wasn't real.

"I want to go back," she choked, closing her eyes to stop the tears growing in her eyes to fall.

"What do you mean, Nona?" Cassian said, and she opened her eyes to see him crouching in front of her. Just like he did when she died.

"This isn't where I belong," she said, and meant it, felt it deep inside her. Deep in her soul. It wasn't her time to pass, and she knew it.

His eyes glinted with worry and sorrow to see his wife in such a condition. There had to be a way to get back, had to be a prayer to say or a ritual to perform.

"What? Do you want to move back to Velaris? Because if you do, I will gladly do it." he said, grabbing onto one of her hands, making sure not to disturb Serena.

"I want to go back to where I belong," she said, closing her eyes and letting her chin drop. "As lovely as this place is, I miss my husband. My husband that I left behind when I died."

The room went quiet leaving the sound the hissing and sighing of the grassy fields surrounding them, the steady breath of Cassian and the soft snores from the babe in her arms.

"Do you really want to go back?" he asked, his voice contorting into some otherworldly.

"Please. I will do anything—anything—to go back." she said, keeping in the sob that tried to break out.

"Of course," he said, but she knew it wasn't Cassian, not anymore. When she opened her eyes and a thin woman was standing in front of her, hair deeper than the black that had replaced the cottage braided around her head like a halo.

The woman walked forward, the liquid starlight gown clinging to her skin hissing slightly, and reached her delicate hand out. "Are you sure you want to go back? To leave the perfect world I have created for you?"

Annona swallowed and nodded, "I don't want to leave my family in pain." That was answer enough because the strange woman placed her hand on Annona's shoulder, gave her a tentative smile, and she faded away into black.

* * *

"She's alive." His words were nothing but a push of air. Real. This was her Cassian, this was her husband. She knew it without even having to open her eyes.

Opening her eyes, she looked to where she knew he was, kneeling on the ground beside the bed, her hand in his. Instead of the sorrow that he had had in his eyes before, they lit up, shining, despite how red they were from tears.

"Holy Mother, Cassian, she really is alive." Rhys breathed from his place at the end of the bed, Feyre standing at his side with her eyes wide. Mor who was sitting on a chair in the corner of the room had stood up, her complete stillness the only show of her surprise. Azriel and Amren stood in the corner; Azriel stood completely still, his shadows nowhere to be seen, and Amren had her arms crossed, blinking.

"Nona, please, say something so that I know this is real," Cassian said, drawing her attention back to him.

She couldn't help but smile as she said, "You're still an ass in the Afterlife."

He was still for a moment, like everyone else in the room, then he roared a laugh so much different to the roar of death he had sounded earlier. This time it was filled with so much joy and happiness, so much that it couldn't be contained. Annona felt that joy and happiness seeping into her, so much so that she started laughing too, followed by everyone else in the room. Even cranky Amren.

She moved, pushing the blankets off of her and jumped onto him and pushing him to the floor, not caring at all that all she wore was a thin nightgown. She leaned down and kissed him, swallowing his laugh. Sitting up, Annona stayed straddling him, letting the laughter bubble out of her.

Annona Varesto, Princess of Velaris, the wife of Cassian, General Commander of the Night Court armies and Prince of Velaris, just came back from the Afterlife.


	2. Chapter Two

For the first hour after she woke up, everyone just chatted about everything and nothing. After they got Annona back into bed with some food and some tea first, of course. Then everyone started to stream out, Amren going first saying that she had things planned, then Azriel saying that he was tired, and by the work he had done during the day, that was valid, then Mor left, promising that she would return tomorrow morning with the best food Velaris had to offer. Then after two hours, Feyre had yawned and asked for Rhys to fly her back to the townhouse and they left after a clap on the shoulder from Cassian and a promise to return in the morning and join them for breakfast.

Cassian had been reluctant to go to the bathroom to prepare for bed, so much so that he had opened the door and called Azriel then waited until the shadowsinger appeared in the hall before him in nothing but his sweatpants and told him to stay with Annona. All while he did this, she had just watched her husband, her eyebrows raised, and then watched the closed bathroom door for multiple minutes after he disappeared through it.

"I hope that Feyre doesn't have to deal with this." Annona huffed, the smile on her lips betrayed the tone of her words. Azriel, who was standing in the corner, shadows covering him, smiled.

"She's his mate," Cassian called from the bathroom, followed by the sound of running water, "I think she has it worse."

Annona smiled and pulled her legs to her chest, picking up the tea from the cherry-wood table beside her. She took a sip of it, the floral taste burning down her throat. "You're just as insufferable!"

Cassian's rumbling laughter reached her from the bathroom, the only sound in the room. She took another burning sip of the tea and set it down.

Then, settled in the silence, her thoughts and the shadow form of Azriel in the corner her only company, her body started shaking at the realization that she had died.

She died, went to the Afterlife, saw what it had to offer, and chose this life instead and had been granted it by who could only be the Mother herself. Unless she was still in the Afterlife but was just given everything she wanted. She did want her husband, want her friends, want Velaris, and she had gotten it.

Before she could fall any further into that endless cavern, calloused hands gripped hers and she stopped shaking.

She lifted her head to see Cassian kneeling in front of her, searching her face with such intensity that it made her chest tighten. The shadowy mass that was Azriel had disappeared, probably off to finally get rest.

Cassian's hair was only half wet, hanging in wet ringlets around his face as if he had jumped out of the bath before he could clean anything to come and comfort her. Which was, of course, exactly what had happened.

"You are alive, Nona. This isn't a trick," he said, and she could tell his words were half for her and half a reassurance to him that she wasn't dead.

"Cass," she started, but whatever she was about to say quickly sizzled away when he pulled her close to him, his large corded arms holding her close to his chest. He didn't kiss her, he didn't need to. He rested his forehead against hers, taking the moment to breathe her in.

"This is very real, my love," he said, his voice held such a softness that he only used with her.

"I hope so," she said, barely a brush of air. There was no way she could know it was true, but she tried to believe it, just for him. Because she could smell him, and feel his muscled chest under her hand, and she could feel his heartbeat and feel his chest rising and falling over and over again at a steady pace.

"I'm here, you're here, and we're both alive."

"Don't leave me," she said, her eyes sliding closed. Exhaustion gnawing on her bones.

He squeezed her and rested his head on her shoulder. "I'm not going anywhere," he promised, holding her so tight she could hardly draw a full breath. She melted into his arms, letting his deep and even breaths lull her to sleep.

* * *

Cassian sat there for what had to be hours, holding his sleeping wife in his arms, listening to her steady heartbeat, counting every breath she took in and let out. He didn't want to admit it, not to himself, not to his wife, not to anyone, but he knew that Annona already knew, she knew everything about him, but he was struggling to believe she was alive.

He had heard her heart stop, had heard her breaths stop coming, had watched her go limp, her face go so calm and serene. He had felt his heart tear and break, over and over again until it started eating on his very soul. He didn't know how he would go on, how he would stand up and leave her side even though he had promised—promised—her that he would.

Everything had seemed impossible, he could hardly breathe, he could hardly be himself. All he wanted to do was bring her back to life, and if that didn't work, he would destroy Hybern. He would fly there himself and destroy everything they held dearly for they had taken what was dearest to him.

But then… Her heart started beating again, and she started breathing and his whole world went still.

He thought himself crazy, hallucinating it, but then she opened her eyes and spoke, then he knew it was real. His Nona, his Princess of Starlight, his wife, had conquered death like the goddess she is.

When keeping his eyes open became nearly impossible, Cassian pulled back the heavy red duvet and laid Annona down. She didn't stir one time. He pulled the blanket onto her and stopped with his hand on her shoulders.

She was always so peaceful in sleep, so much so that she looked nearly human. He constantly found himself forgetting that she was able to make grown men grovel at her feet, begging for mercy; that she had fought in both wars and had kicked so many asses it was a surprise she didn't have thousands of suitors knocking on their door every second of every day.

He remembered the first time he had ever seen her. She was just an actress at one of the many musical theaters littered around Velaris but, Mother save him, she was the most beautiful person he had ever seen. Her voice had lilted through the crowd, blessing everyone there as she twirled and danced around the stage. Annona was so vibrant, so much so that she almost glowed.

He would go back every single night to watch her, and every night he got teased by his brothers, saying he was going to see some girl, and, dammit, they were right. She was everything to him. He would spend two hours each day at the theaters just to see her on stage. To wonder how so much beauty and talent could be held in one female.

One night when he was going to see her musical she was in, his whole family had wanted to come and they gave him no room to argue.

When his friends asked who he was going to see the whole time, he didn't have to say anything when she came on stage.

This time, she wasn't the damsel in distress or the nature bound princess, she was a warrior. A fine sword hung at her side, her hair tied back with a leather strap at her nape. She helped the princess, consoling her and guiding her on her journey. He didn't think she could be more entrancing, but when she pulled the sword out of the sheath, the glinting blade of the sword revealed detailed engravings along it, he knew it wasn't just a prop.

After the War, all the major fighters got their sword engraved with their story on it, and the sword she carried and swung around like a piece of useless wood was engraved with her story.

Later when Rhys made him go to meet with her, she bowed to him and asked, "You finally got the balls to introduce yourself."

At that moment, he told himself that if he didn't marry her, no one would. Rhys had laughed himself hoarse and when he finally calmed down he asked Annona if the sword was hers, and of course, it was, so he asked for her story.

She spoke about how she was born in the Spring Court and didn't have to think twice about what side she would be on for the War. About how she had fought beside the Illyrians and ended up getting captured once by Amarantha before she had clawed her way out to finish the War off. Then she was brought to Velaris, and none of them pushed the issue since she didn't seem to be causing any trouble. Rhys even had Azriel watching her for a good month and nothing came up.

Even after that, even after Cassian had fallen for her so hard and fast, he didn't speak to her again for years. Rhys ended up having to invite her to dinner at a restaurant at the pier before Cassian spoke to her for more than a quick hello and goodbye.

In the end, it took a decade for him to come out to her about his feelings. And Annona, that sweet, strong, beautiful, and talented girl loved him back.


	3. Chapter Three

The blankets rustled as they moved followed by a weight being lifted off of the bed, bringing Cassian from his sleep. Cracking open one eye, he looked to see that Annona was no longer in the bed beside him. It's okay, he told himself, she was just going to the bathroom.

He promised himself that when she returned he would wrap her in his arms and then further wrap his wings so that she wouldn't leave the bed again. He needed to keep her safe in his arms.

When he didn't hear the bathroom door open, he cursed himself for her being so light on her feet and sat up in the bed, searching the room with his eyes until it landed on Annona standing merely a couple of feet away from the wall, staring blankly at it.

He threw the blankets off of himself and sat on the edge of the bed. He slowly pushed to his feet, making sure not to startle her. "Nona, what are you doing up?" he asked, as softly as he could manage. She didn't respond, her breath didn't change, her heart rate didn't quicken or shorten, she just stood there in a trance. Standing up, he took one half-step forward. "Come back to bed,"

She didn't react again, she only lifted a hand, one of her daggers in it, and brought it down to her arm. He couldn't move fast enough; he couldn't grab the dagger out of her hand and throw it across the room quick enough. The sound of the metal clattering along the marble floor rang out in his ears as he grabbed onto Annona's shoulders and spun her around. He had to swallow when he saw the hollowed-out haze of her once shining green eyes.

"Nona!" he shouted, shaking her shoulders, trying to wipe that blank look off her face and wake her from whatever trance she was in. "Please, Annona!"

His heart broke when he saw the haze lifted from her eyes as she jolted back into reality, falling limp into his arms. He didn't know what else to do, so he rocked her, holding her tight to his chest, stroking her hair and whispering promises that she was safe.

Honestly, he had no idea if she was okay. If she knew what she was doing, if she was planning to end her life and stage it as some accident or if her actions were truly driven by some sort of nightmare. Either way, he hoped that she was happy, that she wanted to be alive as much as he wanted her to. But he would wait. Yes, he would wait a week or so to see how she acts, to see if she is happy.

* * *

Annona awoke in the morning wrapped in Cassian's tattooed muscled arms and a wall of his membrane wings. She looked up at his wings, tracing the red veins with her eyes.

Outside of this warm and dim cocoon, it was probably blindingly bright meaning it was probably sometime after eight since that was when the sun completely rose. Since Cassian lived by the live motto of "the sun's up, so I'm up" he never slept in. For the three-hundred years, she had known him, he had only slept in two times, not including today. Though, knowing him, he was probably already awake, just waiting for her.

Just like she did every time his wings were wrapped around her, she lifted her hand and rested it gently against them, being well aware of how sensitive they were. She lifted her hand until only her index finger remained and ran it down the velvety membrane until there was no wing left and rested her hand on his where it was draped across her stomach.

In answer, there was a tickle of breath on her ear. "I missed being woken up like that."

She smiled sadly and melted back into his chest, savoring the warmth it provided her.

The last she had woken him up like that was before Rhys had been trapped Under the Mountain. After that, stress was always running high. If there wasn't some dispute to deal with within city limits, there was always the presence of the fact that they could never see Rhys again; that he would be trapped under that miserable mountain for the rest of eternity. Not to mention that they weren't even able to leave the perimeter of the city, not that she didn't mind being here in the City of Starlight amongst her people. It just sucked away the freedom she always craved and sought after for her and her people, but she had lived with it for her High Lord.

"I'm surprised you slept at all," Annona said, her voice soft by sleep. His arm tightened around her stomach and she closed her eyes. Her chest tightened.

"Hardly," he said, his breath brushed her ear and she smiled, knowing that was how it felt to touch his wings. A feather-light kiss on her shoulder told her he was thinking the same. "How did you sleep?"

An image flashed in her mind: Cassian standing in front of her, both of his hands on her shoulders, staring into her eyes, his heartbeat pounding in her ears. "It was the best I've slept for over fifty years," she said and meant it.

"I just hope it was because of me," he said, giving her another feather-light kiss. She moved and sensing she was getting up, Cassian retracted his wing, folding it tightly behind his back.

Sitting up at the edge of the bed, she let her head hang and ran her hands over her face, feeling slightly detached. She ignored it, especially as Cassian stood up and walked to his armoire and opened it, fishing out a pair of fighting leathers and his Siphons.

As she stood up, she froze for a moment, feeling severely light-headed and not-of-this-world. Then a vision flashed before her eyes, almost too quick to understand it, but the information that it had brought stayed in her mind nonetheless: A crown of stars; a crown of blue fire; and a dragon-like creature, with rolling rich green fields flowing beneath it.

Luckily, when she regained her composure Cassian didn't seem to notice since he was facing the wall, pulling on the pants to his fighting leathers.

"I need to have a bath," Annona said, taking a step forward and blinking away the slight haze that still stayed over her senses. With it disappearing, she found Cassian standing by the door to the room, his hand on the ornate golden doorknob, fully dressed, his Siphons shining and both of his blades' hilts showing above his shoulders.

"Are you okay?" he asked, and she nodded, taking another step forward, avoiding looking at his worry-filled eyes.

"I'm good," she said, "I'll see you in a little for breakfast."

"Don't take too long," he said, smiling and left through the door.

The vision kept replaying itself within her head as she stumbled into the steaming lavender-scented waters of the deep bath and out of it into her dressing room lined with vibrant and muted colored gowns.

It took her a couple of minutes to pick out a gown.

Running her hand along the gowns it slowed on one of her favorite dresses: a long cream-colored gown, diamonds are sewn along the bottom in a gradient up to the bodice that was so blank and simple it was impossible not to look at it.

It was made to resemble her wedding gown, a stunning display of tulle and silk and diamonds so large and stunning that it had left everyone breathless when she had shown it to them first. Of course, Cassian hadn't seen it until the wedding day, so she nearly laughed herself hoarse when she saw him pale, turn a wonderful shade of red, then returned to normal.

She smiled at the memory of her wedding. She had spent her whole fortune and half of Cassian's to get the wedding gown and this one made, not to mention the costs for the wedding that Rhys had so gallantly paid.

Sorting through some more gowns and landed on a lacy light-pink dress. Flowers were embroidered over the large skirts and bodice.

Nostalgia rushed through her, reminding her of her time in the Spring Court. She was the youngest daughter of a nobody Lord who had riches that rivaled that of the High Lord's.

She was always wearing pastel gowns, wearing delicate flowers in her hair and meandering through gardens full of vibrant and sweet-smelling flowers. She truly proved her father wrong by becoming Princess of Velaris, she was never blinded by luxury.

Annona slipped into the dress, delighted to find it fitting comfortably, and sat herself down at the vanity. She did her hair up in an easy crown of braids and looped delicate diamond earrings in her ear.

It was by no means the fanciest look, but for someone who just rose from the dead, it was enough to still look the part of Princess.

Remembering she had to be at breakfast, she quickly applied some jasmine oils on her neck and wrists then started on her way.

The sun was bright as it streamed into the quaint breakfast room. Vines crept along red-stone pillars reaching up to the tall, vaulted ceiling, a chandelier hanging in the center over the glass table filled to the brim of breakfast food. Ripe strawberries, red and green apples, grapes, bacon, eggs, it had it all.

"You are..." Cassian started, standing up, a half-eaten plate of food in front of him. It seems like everyone else had eaten half of their food as well. They were probably taking their time eating just so that she could join them.

Mor, from where she sat, a strawberry stuffed in her mouth, said, "Stunning. The word you are looking for, Cassian, is stunning." Cassian glared at her and she replied by sticking her tongue out.

"Maybe I should've married Mor, she is better at complimenting than you," Annona said, looking down at her dress and flattening it despite the perfect fall of it.

Cassian walked up to her pecked a kiss on her cheek and pulled her into a hug and whispered in her ear, "I should've come got you,"

Annona squeezed him back, and everyone looked away—to the food in front of them, to the person sitting next to them—acting like they couldn't see their interaction. "I'm here now," she said, reluctantly pulling away.

Cassian offered a tentative smile and walked over to the table, pulling out the chair only open chair: the head of the table. She quickly walked up to the table and bowed her head to Cassian and sat down. Cassian sat down in the chair to her right and started to pile food onto her plate. She cut him a glance but he ignored that and kept piling food on her plate, worry evident in his eyes.

"How are you feeling?" Rhys asked from where he sat to her left. She shrugged picking up the crystal glass in front of her and took a sip of the berry juice that Cassian had just poured her.

"Better than you would think," she said and set down the glass to start on her food, taking a biscuit and buttering it. "I am kind of disappointed that I didn't figure out the rules of the universe or the meaning of life, but being able to live again is well enough of a prize."

They all gave a tentative nod and smile and went to eating and talking among themselves. Cassian placed a hand on her knee.

She picked at her food for a bit, eating some things here and there, while everyone else spoke about what they were to do for the day, Cassian glancing back at her every minute or two. Azriel was going to see how the Illyrians were recovering since Cassian was going to stay here with Annona until she was stable, which she didn't object to, because she did die. Mor was heading to the Hewn City to check on things there to the slight objection from Azriel. Amren was going to do whatever she does, probably make sure no suspicious people were walking around. Rhys was going to go meet with High Lord Tarquin to check on things with him. Feyre would stay at the townhouse with her sisters, leaving Cassian and Annona practically alone in the House of Wind save for the very scarce servants.

Annona propped herself up on a fist, having been hit by a wave of disorientation. "I have to have a meeting with the Palace Governors to make sure everything is good there as soon as I am able," she said, and no one argued, Cassian just squeezed her thigh.

"Let me know when you have it planned, I'll make sure I'm there," Rhys said, sipping on the red berry juice from the crystal glace.

Annona closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. "I should also probably perform. One in each Palace, hang out for a bit, talk."

This time Cassian did object, "No. You aren't well enough to."

She looked at him, not even trying to lift her head from her hand. "Do my people know about my condition?" He shook his head. "They will think I have abandoned them or I have died. If they think that, then hopes will run low and tension will run high. Meaning, my people will suffer." He gave her an incredulous look. "I made an oath when I was crowned: Nothing will tear me from my duties, not a lover, not children, not a greater more powerful position. Not even death." Somehow, she managed to look down at him, not as his wife, but as his Princess, his equal in power. "Just because I have died doesn't mean that my people do not trust me and look to me for support."

"Just don't overexert yourself," he said, giving her leg another squeeze because he knew that when she promised something or had taken an oath, she would stay by it. And her people, they were her everything. If she had to, she would leave Cassian behind if she thought it would be harmful to her people to keep him by her side.

"Do you need me to get letters to anyone before I leave?" Azriel asked, and Annona nodded.

"I will get the letters written up as soon as I finish—" she trailed off, suddenly becoming detached from her mind and body completely and placed in another vision—

The once rolling green hills were bathed in red, carnage all over them. Friend and foe, by what she could feel as eyes that weren't hers looked over them. A voice, almost too faint to hear, called out, "Manon, it's time to move out."

The person—Manon—turned around, white hair whipping in the wind to face a war camp, nearly all packed up save for two or three tents that were being put down by bloodied soldiers. All of them had round ears. Human. But the person had called out, she was a golden-haired Fae with beautiful turquoise eyes with rings of gold.

"If we don't move north now, Erawan's forces will catch up with us," the golden-haired Fae said, taking a short step forward. If this was Annona's body, she would've squinted at the fangs—_fangs_—that the Fae had.

"Let's hope backup gets here soon," Manon said, walking forward, the ground squished underneath her feet. Blood. "or else we'll all be dead like those soldiers." An all-knowing nod from the golden-haired Fae had the vision folding away into darkness—

She flinched, shooting up straight in her chair. It must've been a second for everyone else because everyone was in the exact position as they were before. Not even knowing what she was saying, she turned to Rhys. "Fire. Get all the fire-wielders you can and train them all, and train them hard. It's the only line of attack that will save us from this next war."

Saying nothing else, she shot to her feet and rushed out of the room to write those letters for Azriel to deliver. Her heart pounding in her ears.

The next morning when she got up there were posters all over Velaris asking for any fire-wielder willing to learn how to fight would be trained for free by the General and the Princess.


	4. Chapter Four

It was a couple of days before she got all the responses from the letters had Azriel send a couple of days ago. As she sat at her desk, her head in her hands, feeling very light-headed and detached, a letter faded into existence. That was nine letters, each from one of Annona's former colleagues from when she was an actress agreeing to meet up with her at the Rainbow early tomorrow afternoon.

She had finally been able to convince Cassian that he should go and work, so he was off at the Windhaven camp, instilling some fear in Devlon. Everyone else was busy with something, even the High Lady had meetings to attend across the city to check on how everything is going. She promised to inform anyone she came in contact with that Annona had obtained a serious injury during the final battle and was quickly healing and would be doing a performance tomorrow at the Rainbow.

"Nuala," Annona said, summoning the shadow-wraith that was surely lurking in the shadows nearby.

"Yes," the shadow-wraith said, solidifying beside Annona's desk, her voice sheepish.

Annona knew enough about Cassian—and Azriel—that they would have one of the shadow twins watch her to make sure that she was safe and healthy. To make sure that she didn't die or harm herself since Cassian seemed to think she was suicidal. She didn't know why, but she did know she woke up almost every night, Cassian holding onto her face, tears filling his eyes as they stood in the middle of the room on top of the plush cream-colored carpet, a blade normally discarded randomly in the room.

"Could you deliver a letter to Helion for me?" she asked and sat straight, picking up and moving papers that lay spread across her desk until she finally found a thick letter wax sealed with an image of three mountains and three stars above the middle one. The seal of the Court of Dreams. She reached over the table and handed it to Nuala where it instantly turned to shadow. "And please don't tell anyone about it. Or at least make sure Azriel doesn't tell anyone."

Nuala only nodded, muttering, "Right away, Milady," before she faded into the shadows.

She stood up and braced her hands against the table to stop herself from falling over. She blinked, waiting for the dizzy spell to pass, or for the vision that normally came with the disorientation to come and go. The visions came so often now that it was just another part of the daily routine.

The disorientation started to subside and she braved stepping away from the table, but a vision hit her, but this time it was only voices, everything else a cold and dark blackness—

"I don't know how much longer I can do this." a female voice said—that golden-haired Fae that kept appearing in these visions who Annona had learned was a queen.

"The reinforcements from Wendlyn and the Southern Continent should be here any day. So just hold on a little longer." a male voice said—one that she had never heard before.

"They should've been here weeks ago, Rowan! What if Chaol and Nesryn couldn't get the Khagan to agree to send help? We will lose, Rowan. We will lose." Her words were breathless and clipped. A queen pained by her subject's suffering.

"We just need to get to Orynth," he said. And she felt the vision fading away after a map flashed before her, just long enough for her to remember it—

Light flooded her eyes and she felt two scarred hands on her shoulder shaking her and a feminine voice—Mor's voice—calling out, "I'm going to find Cassian."

Annona forced her eyes to open despite the pounding ache in her head and tingling sensation in her arm. She winced. She knew what that sensation meant, and it wasn't good. It meant that she was healing from a deep wound, one that would likely have killed any human.

She didn't even try to move any of her body as she looked up at Azriel to see him crouching over her. His hazel eyes burning with concern and his wings tucked in tightly behind his back.

"Do you know what happened?" he asked, concern full in his voice.

"No. Was there some sort of attack?" she said, jerking up into a sitting position. Her eyes shot around the room, not sure what she was looking for. A squeeze on her shoulders by Azriel had her looking back to him and her head started to pound. She was somewhat grateful for the difference of it from being light-headed.

"No. You went into a trance and cut your arm, you weren't healing quick enough so you passed out from blood loss. Nuala came back and told me she found you on the floor." he said, and took his hands away from her shoulders and she lifted her arm and looked down at it, her eyes widened at the long scar spreading from her wrist up to her elbow. "The scar should heal over."

Another wave of dizziness rushed over her and she had to lean her head against the oak-wood of her desk. She nodded absently and looked around the room once again, more carefully this time, and saw one of her daggers lying on the ground covered in blood.

Then something dawned on her. Sometimes when she had a vision, she would move towards a wall, and fifty percent of the time she would come back with a dagger in her hand. Maybe that's what was happening at night. It would make sense. Partially.

Maybe she was trying to do something during the visions. Maybe the visions were trying to convey something to her.

"What did your shadows say?" she asked, looking back down at her arm.

"That you were planning something stupid," he said, and she snorted and shook her head.

"They didn't give you any details?" she asked, looking up at Azriel. She wanted to figure out what, exactly, stupid thing the shadows were picking up on. He shook his head. "Well, that's helpful." A smile cracked out onto his lips as running steps sounded in the gold-lined halls outside of Annona's well-lit office.

They both knew that it was Cassian without having to look, or without Azriel's shadows searching. He came into the double-door doorway of her office and stopped, his hand braced against the door frame, his eyes going straight to her.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly, his breath steadying after he saw that she was alive and non-injured. She could smell the fear wafting off of Cassian. His eyes drifted down to her dress, and she followed his gaze down to her dress and her breath caught in her throat when she saw the blood coating half of the pale-blue gossamer.

She swallowed. "I'm fine, you Illyrian baby," A laugh bubbled out of her throat and her head lulled back against the leg of the table. Mother, she was exhausted. "Blood is blood, Cass. It'll be there when we have a child, it'll be there when they trip and scrape their knee, and it'll be there when they try to fly for the first time."

"We're having children now?" he said, and Azriel stood and backed away from Annona. Only when Cassian came and sat down beside Annona did Azriel fall back into his shadows.

"I mean," She slipped her fingers through his and squeezed his hand, "we've been together for over three-hundred years and there's no war, plus I've seen things in the Afterlife."

He swallowed before he spoke, his eyebrows rising. "Like what?" he asked, and she knew it killed him to ask such a personal thing. She shrugged and could feel his eyes on her.

"We had a child, Cassian," she said and pushed her energy into turning her head to look at him. A smile tugged on his lips. "We had a beautiful little girl and I have never wanted a child more. She was everything. Everything, Cassian. You were such a good father—you will be an amazing father."

"What—What did she look like?" he asked, silver lining his hazel eyes.

"She looked like any chubby baby, but she had my eyes and your hair," she said, and Cassian smiled. "But no wings."

His smile turned into a smirk and he kissed her forehead. He took his arm and wrapped it around her waist, pulling her close to him. She let out a content sigh as she leaned her head against his shoulder.

"So," he said, "what if she doesn't have wings. She'll still be a fantastic warrior."

"She's a warrior now?" she asked, pulling away far enough to see his eyes, her eyebrows raising and a playful smile tugging at her lips.

He pecked a kiss on her nose, "She can be whatever she wants to be. She can lounge around on sofas all day and have fresh pastries prepared every second of the day if she so pleases."

"Hmm," She leaned her head on his shoulder again, her head becoming far too heavy to keep up.

"Hmm what?" he asked, his voice vibrating through her. The cool-mist smell of him was evidence of him being up in the Steppes lulled her body to relax, practically putting her to sleep. When he wasn't, he smelled of rich and blooming forests, altered by the pine-smelling soap he used. "You want me to serve you fresh pastries at all hours of the day, or just let you lounge on a sofa? Either way, I'm all for it as long as I can join you."

He planted a kiss on the top of her head and slid his other arm beneath her legs and pulled her onto his lap. Cradled in his arms, Annona's eyes fell closed. She grabbed onto the cool leather of his shirt and breathed in his scent.

Maybe, just maybe, she could have a good night. Maybe she could have a nap and not be plagued with the visions. She could only hope and pray.

"Cassian?" she said, her voice near-silent.

"Yes?"

"I think it's time—to start a family. Life is too precious of a gift to keep to ourselves," she said, and Cassian's heart faltered a beat, then sped up in his happiness. She had to open her eyes and look at him to see his reaction. To see how bright his eyes were and how wide his smile was. Annona's chest tightened then exploded with joy.

"Really?" he asked, his arms tightening around her, waiting for her answer.

Her only answer was the arms thrown around his shoulders. He let out a bubbling laugh, so much different from his normal roaring laughter. The joy that rushed through her was so pure and unfiltered that she couldn't understand it. The only other time she had felt like this was her first night with Cass, and that had been a new sort of magical.


	5. Chapter Five

After having a nap earlier that afternoon, Annona couldn't fall asleep. She cursed herself because she had to be up early tomorrow, earlier than Cassian, and that was saying something. If she wanted the performance to go well, she had to meet with everyone hours before it to make sure they have some semblance of coordination.

Still, no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't fall asleep. Her mind kept going back to those visions, or the map that they had fed her. On it, there was army formations and locations. She would be a fool not to know that. But she didn't understand who was who, or where that place truly was. It matched none of the continents she knew, nor did a Queen Aelin ring a bell.

Deciding it wasn't wise to stir in her thoughts, Annona pushed aside the blankets and sat upon the edge of the bed, only to get hit with a wave dizziness. This isn't the time for a vision, she told herself.

"What's wrong?" Cassian asked, groggy from sleep. She reached back absently and squeezed his hand.

"I can't sleep," she said, standing, "Might as well get some work done."

She turned to find Cassian's head propped up on fist, his eyes half-closed. "Don't keep yourself up too long. You're cranky when you don't sleep enough."

Turning, she looked at him through slanted eyes. He gave her a sloppy grin.

"I don't want you cranky either," she said, offering up a small smile. "Don't stay up for me." With that, she left the bedroom and started down the hallway.

The House was always so quiet at night. To be honest, it was quiet during the day, but with the bustle of the few servants that worked here, it had some feeling of normality. At night, though, it felt as if she lived in a deserted mansion too far away from any civilization to hear any sound of activity. But that could also purely be because her and Cassian's bedchambers were as far into the mountain, practically in the middle of it.

The white and gray marble was cold beneath her bare feet, a splash of auburn light reflected from the few candles onto the smooth surface. So much so that Annona wanted to turn around and get her silk slippers, but decided against it because she didn't want to worry Cassian.

She turned down the hallway leading to her office and when she got to the grand doors, she could hear cheers and joyous music from Velaris floating up to her office. Pushing open the door, it sounded as if she were on the streets with everyone else in the midst of it.

She didn't remember there being any sort of party or special occasion tonight. If there was something and she'd missed it… she wouldn't forgive herself anytime soon.

Making her way through the office, she pulled her robe tighter around herself and craned her neck to look through the crack in the pale yellow gossamer curtains.

She pulled back the curtains and froze when she looked down at the streets of Velaris.

People were dressed finely, their clothes and hair a glittering ball of jewels. They laughed and sung, gripping onto each other for support as they stumbled down the streets drunk out of their minds. Her people, the people Annona had dedicated her life to serving were partying freely and she wasn't there to share the joy with them.

Switching her attention to Rhys's townhouse, she saw him and Feyre sitting on the roof each lounging on a chaise, toasting a flute of champagne before drinking deeply.

"It's amazing, isn't it?"

Annona spun to see Mor standing in the doorway, her golden hair laying unkempt over her shoulders and her pale nightgown looking nothing like what she would normally wear as if she'd been awoken mid-sleep by the sounds of music and laughter.

"What is it?" Annona asked, turning back to the scene before her. It was beautiful. Musicians lined the streets, playing unforgivably in tunes of joy and peace.

"Some news came in today brought by a shipment of spices," Mor said, coming up to stand beside Annona. She looked out the window with Mor, waiting for her to continue, "They said that you were the one to change the tides of the war and that you had sacrificed your life for it." Anonna's hand lifted to her throat as emotions rushed through her. "According to Az, they're calling you Mother-Gifted and Velaris's Angel. You conquered death and faced the worst and are still here serving them. They love you, Ann."

Her throat closed up on a sob, silent tears streaming down her cheeks. All of this was to celebrate her. The people she would destroy herself to keep safe were cheering her name in the streets and toasting to her success. It was supposed to be her, toasting and celebrating them, not the other way around.

She started to choke on a sob, dizziness taking over again. Mother help me, she thought, this isn't the time for a vision. Just as she thought it, her sight was wiped away, replaced by the worst possible thing—

Standing on an endless field, winter-frosted grass as far as the eye could see, an army dawned the horizon. Darkness seemed to radiate from them despite the sky being bright and full of early-winter sun. A horrible cadence of swords banging on shields followed them, shaking everyone to the bone.

In front of the person stood three Fae males. They looked at the opposing army, shoulders tense and chins high. They were the only other Fae aside from that queen in these visions. By the way they held themselves, with the blades covering them and that primal grace, they had to be warriors, trained and tested against armies far larger than the one they would soon face.

The eyes she was seeing through looked over and at the golden hair snapping over her face, Annona knew she was looking through the queen's eyes. She now faced a strongly-built white-haired Fae, a warrior like the other ones. Tattoos covered his face, the words in some ancient language. Working her mind, Annona was able to make up one word: failure.

"Twenty-thousand," she said, looking back to the army. "Only twenty-thousand soldiers. We can destroy them quickly and have twenty-thousand less Valg to fight later."

Valg… what the hell was a Valg? That was the first time they had mentioned anything like that.

"We can do this, Fireheart." the male said, his voice coating with so much sincerity that Annona knew they were lovers, maybe even husband and wife. That was the voice she had heard earlier, that was Rowan—

"Ann?" Mor's voice was quiet but rushed with worry. Annona came back, the light and music returning. Mor stood exactly where she was but had a dagger in her hand. One that Annona had no doubt summoned as soon as she fell into the vision.

"I'm fine," she offered, looking at the city below with a hollowed-out gaze. The pure joy that had filled her moments before was gone, dissipated, clouded by that haunting vision. "Please don't tell Cassian. I don't want him worrying."

Mor gave a short nod and set the dagger down on the windowsill. They had a sort of trust between each other with Annona being the only person to have known of Mor's sexual preferences long before she had ever come out to her High Lady. Once upon a time, they were even lovers.

She had to research, had to figure out what was going on. Hopefully, Helion would respond to her letter and allow her to come to the library at his palace, the library said to hold any information that you could ever need. The only library the High Lord was able to protect from Amarantha. Annona had already searched the library below the House and couldn't find anything of use.

"Wait, you—" Mor started, looking over at Annona. She waved her hand in the air, probably hoping that whatever she was going to say would just appear in front of them.

"I didn't do that on purpose, no," Annona said, facing Mor. Mor's caramel eyes widened, then she clapped her hands together, the sound immediately eaten up by the music.

"Cassian told me about it—you waking up at night, getting a dagger…" she cut herself off, "Long story short, he told me you had a dazed look in your eyes, and I didn't understand it but… You truly looked like you were in a trance during whatever that was." She paused, and Annona had to hold her breath. "You're not doing it."

Mor surged forward and crushed Annona in a tight hug. She hugged her back, unsure of what else she should do.

How many people had Cassian told? Even if he'd told the whole of the Inner Circle, she couldn't be mad at him. He was only worried about her and wanted to keep her safe and healthy.

Mor pulled back and wiped a tear from her cheek with the back of her hand. She patted Annona's arm and offered up a smile. "I should get back to bed," she said, folding her arms in front of her chest. "You should head to sleep soon as well," She left with that, the silk of her nightgown rustling in her wake, leaving Annona alone in her office with the sound of her blissful people.

She cast one more look outside then sat down at her desk, pulled out an empty scroll, and started to draw, humming to the sound of the music.

* * *

Hours went by, the party calming down outside to the casual hum of the night-citizens going about their daily activities, and Annona was still not tired. She had gone through three different versions of the map until she finally landed on one she liked. One that displayed the locations of the armies the best and that seemed the most accurate.

Maybe she was mad, maybe the cost of coming back from the Afterlife was her sanity. If that was so… she would deal with that later, but now, she wanted to understand what she was being shown. So she cataloged names and added messy sketches of what the person looked like. It was now that she was grateful she had taken art classes when she still lived in the Spring Court.

After she had done all that, she still needed to do more. She wanted to figure out what the hell was happening to her. With nothing else left to catalog she turned to writing music, hoping that it would give her some kind of reprieve.

She grabbed scraps of paper and a piece of charcoal and headed to her music room.

The room was lavish, plush carpets were strewn artfully across the floor, tapestries depicting the creation of the world hung around the walls, making the room practically sound-proofed once the thick wooden door was pulled closed. Two couches were pushed up against the wall and by the discoloring in them it was obvious they were well used.

Annona would play music for her friends as often as possible, mostly once a week, but then Amarantha had happened and everything changed. Everything that had seemed normal was reshaped into something new.

Walking up to the grand pianoforte she ran her hand along the rich wood, sighing in contentment at the familiar cold.

At last, she sat down, the feeling of setting her hands on the keys foreign yet familiar at the same time. She hadn't played since… when? Since before Rhys had gone Under the Mountain, for sure.

For the first couple of minutes of playing random keys, she started to get the feel of it again. Started to remember the way the keys gave way for the light notes, the way her voice twined with them perfectly to make a lovely cadence of sound that flowed through the whole room, not breaking past the door.

She started writing music, a song that took all the information from her visions and applied them to paper and voice, but soon she found out that she was writing down information she hadn't ever been aware of. Even though this frightened her a bit, she ignored it and kept writing, enjoying the cool emptiness it left behind.

In no time at all, she had three different songs written. Well, it had to be hours, because Cassian pulled the wooden door open and cautiously stepped into the room.

His hazel eyes instantly went to her and lit up with surprise and relief. "I woke up and you weren't there, I checked the breakfast room, you weren't there, and then your office." he rambled, a relieved smile lighting up his face. "It's been a while since I've been in here."

He pulled the door closed behind him and walked up to Annona, pressed a kiss to her cheek, then leaned up against the wall by her piano. "What are you doing here, anyway?"

"I couldn't sleep and I felt like writing some songs," she said, and picked up the three different pages and held them out. Cassian took them and read over them, his eyes brightening as he read further down the page.

While he did that, she changed her focus to the piano in front of her and started playing, not sure what she was intending to play. Her fingers turned to the tune of one of the songs she had just written, so she followed it, playing for her husband for the first time in what felt like forever.

The papers had gone limp in Cassian's hands as he looked at his wife longingly, love and sincerity filling his eyes. He didn't even take his eyes off of her when Azriel came in and sat down, nor when Mor followed right after him.

After the first song, Annona didn't stop, she just kept going. Two songs turned into three, three turned into four. In the middle of the fourth and fifth song, Rhys and Feyre walked into the room and silently took a seat on one of the couches.

"Now we just need Amren," Annona said, smiling at her family. "Then we will have everyone here."

As if her words summoned the beast, Amren walked through the door, cast a glare to Cassian who had let out a snort, and leaned up against a tapestry of the Cauldron and crossed her arms in front of her chest. The way she stood was casting out a loud message: I'm just here for the music, and to not talk to her.

Looking up to Cassian, she offered a smile and started to play. Cassian stilled so much that she had to listen to see if he was still breathing. The whole room had likewise gone still, pulled back into a memory. Save for Feyre, who gave a look of confusion then thanks to that bond with Rhys, she watched Annona, a sort of awe in her eyes.

The music pulled her into a memory long gone, the first song Cassian had ever seen her perform, the first time he had ever seen her. Before anyone could have any time to recover, she jumped into the next song, the tone a jarring change. The song she was singing when Cassian fell in love with her.

As the song finished, everyone was left in comfortable silence. That is until Cassian spoke up, "I wasn't expecting this sort of emotional beating so early in the morning."

Annona looked at her husband to see his eyes clouded with tears. She couldn't help the smile that spread across her lips as she jumped to her feet and pulled Cassian into a hug. She didn't care what anyone else thought.

"You know," she whispered, quiet enough that the Fae in the room wouldn't hear, "I could be pregnant with our child."

Yes, she could be pregnant since they tried last night. Cassian was so overjoyed by the idea of starting a family that he'd wanted to start trying right away, though she doubted she would get pregnant so soon. If anything, she hoped she could get pregnant by the end of the decade.

"Do you two mind telling us what you're whispering about," Mor said, and Annona turned, a blissful smile on her lips and squeezed Cassian's hand, motioning for him to tell their friends and family.

He looked to her, a wolfish grin finding its place on his lips. "We've decided," he said, looking back to everyone, "that we want to have a child."

It was Rhys who reacted first, standing and walking to the center of the room where he met Cassian and clapped his brother on the shoulder then pulled him into a hug. "I can't wait to be an uncle!" He pulled back and smiled at Annona. "You better hurry and get me a nephew."

Mor pushed to her feet and sent a glare to Rhys. "It's going to be a girl, I know it! We will go shopping together and wear the cutest matching dresses!"

Amren snorted, "She will have better fashion than that, to wear matching dresses."

Azriel flicked his eye to her but smiled. "We'll have to teach her not to touch Amren's jewels," he added, to the flashing red smile Amren gave him.

"I'll teach her how to paint," Feyre chimed, standing up from the couch to stand at her mate's side. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her in close, looking at her as if she were the most precious thing in the world. That was the exact way Cassian looked at her when he turned back around to smile at her.

They spoke as if she were already pregnant, already blessed with the gift of a small babe growing in her belly, but she knew she wasn't. Call it a sixth sense, but she knew. No High Fae ever got pregnant that quick. But maybe… just maybe she would be lucky enough to not have to wait forever to be blessed with a child.

A soft knock at the door silenced the conversation and Amren, being the closest to the door, grabbed onto it and pushed it open. If Azriel hadn't notified them of anyone approaching, they had to just be a servant or one of his shadow-spies coming to clean the room or deliver a message.

It ended up being the latter. Nuala stood in the doorway fully corporeal with two letters in her hand. She looked to Amren, bowed her head, then looked to Annona and bowed.

"I'm sorry to interrupt," she said, rising from the bow, "but I have an urgent letter for You Highness from the Hechird Estate addressing the status of the residents." The silence reigned as Nuala came up and handed the letter to Annona.

Annona swallowed as she looked at the lazy willow tree wax seal, the wax a cool shade of green. It was indeed from her father's estate, the only question was what it was about. Nuala had said it was about the status of the estate, and that could mean a couple of things. It could mean the Lady, Annona's mother, was pregnant again, it could mean her father, the Lord, had retired his position, or he had passed.

For some reason, she hoped it wasn't the latter. No matter how much she hated him, she couldn't wish death on the poor man.

Opening the letter, the only sound in the room was the rustling of the parchment. Cassian took a step towards her as her heart stalled in her chest and her face drained of color.

"What is it?" Cassian asked calmly.

She looked up and held back the urge to crush the letter in her hands. Her eyes burned as tears threatened to fall. "Father has passed suddenly and all my brothers died in the war. Mother is pregnant, barely so, so I must act as Lady Regent until the baby is born. If it's a male, I will be Lady Regent until he comes of age, and if it's a female, I will be Lady Annona of Hechird. The head of House."


	6. Chapter Six

It was so quiet and not even Amren dared to voice one of her snarky remarks knowing what would happen if she did. Blood pounded in her ears and Annona could hardly keep her temper. By the way Rhysand slightly positioned himself in front of Feyre, Annona knew her temper was showing. The air around them became thinner, making breaths come slower and harder to take.

She was the youngest of five older brothers and was pampered and preened as the one daughter her mother had. She had seven brothers that were before her in the line to inheriting the title of Lord of Hechird so she never imagined she would ever be considered for the position.

How would she be able to look over the estate lands and the few people that occupied it while still serving her people whole-heartedly here? She didn't want to abandon any of them, but she also didn't want to be dragged from her relationship with Cassian.

She loved him, she needed him. He was her other half, he was her best friend, he was her everything. Even though she had once said that she would look past her love and own needs to look out for her people, she felt like no matter how hard she tried she couldn't ignore Cassian.

"Nona," Cassian said, and she snapped back into reality, blinking away the emotions. The air returned to normal and everyone took in a deep and hearty breath. If only to distract her from crushing under the pressure, Cassian pointed to the other letter in Annona's hand. "Who's that letter from?"

Taking the bait, she folded up the letter and handed it to Cassian who took it and discretely slid it in his pocket, happy to rid her of that small burden.

It only gave her another thing to worry about, because it was the Day Court's seal imprinted into the golden wax. At least Helion replied, that gave some comfort at least. Seeing the seal, Rhys and Cassian's eyebrows lifted, the others not knowing how to react, or if they should react at all.

"Why would Helion be contacting you?" Cassian asked, voicing the question everyone in that room wanted to ask.

Annona didn't want to answer, so she just opened the letter and read over it. Helion said he would be more than pleased for her to take a visit to his library and that he would want to escort her himself if he was available when she went. It wasn't a surprise since when Annona was only known as the Night Court Emissary they were good friends and got along quite well. She even flirted with him a bit, much to the dismay of Cassian, to get him further on the good side of the Night Court.

And when she'd made her appearance at the High Lord's meeting as the Princess of Velaris, Helion hadn't been surprised as the rest of them were. He'd later told her at a pass in the hall that she had the heart and mind of a noble princess and fit the position much more than she fitted the position of an emissary.

"He just wants to have a good relation with Velaris and its over-looker," she said and gestured at herself. She didn't want to tell any lies, but it wouldn't be painful if they ever found out the truth. Now that she thought about it, it didn't make any sense to keep it hidden, but she had done it and now she couldn't backtrack for fear of losing their trust.

After a pause, Amren brought back the tense air when she said, "So what are you doing?"

Cassian looked to her as if he would pounce on him, but Annona merely stepped forward and put her hand on his arm then he stood down, looking to her with sorrow-filled eyes.

"I…" she started and cursed herself for stuttering. She never stuttered, but what she was about to say was making her sick to the stomach to even think about it. "I have to cancel the performance."

At the stunned look Mor gave her, she swallowed and added, "Mother is pregnant and loved her husband dearly. I am her only living child and I can't leave my mother to suffer like that no matter how much my heart yearns to be amongst my people."

Rhys gave her a tight smile and at the understanding in his eyes, she knew she had made the right choice no matter how much it tore her apart.

Sometimes she had to make these decisions, sometimes she regretted it, sometimes she didn't. She made the right decision, she knew it. She could perform any day, but only now did her mother need her.

"Do you need me to come?" Cassian asked, the tone of his voice soft and considerate.

"No offense, but my mother may be a bit startled to see a good-looking brute with massive wings and one hell of an ego show up on her doorstep in hand with her precious flower." She said, and Cassian tilted his head in an animal-like way, blinked, then burst into a roaring laugh.

Rhys, Mor, and Feyre quickly joined the laughter, Azriel letting out a soft laugh and Amren smiling ferally. It was simple to change the tone of the room. She had done so so many times before it was practically second-nature.

It was true about her mother, though. Lady Alera was a quiet and soft woman that had never once had to pick up a weapon or raise her voice. She was a doting mother and wife, doing everything in her power to make the people around her happy and make sure they were well-loved. Her mother was where she got her selflessness from and she suddenly felt the pain of not visiting her mother in centuries, ever since the end of the War. For all she knew, Annona could be dead.

"You should have a bath and rest first," Cassian said, coming back from his laughing fit. She looked at him and gave a soft smile. He searched her face with an intensity that he only used when he was trying to figure out what she was feeling.

She had never felt this sort of regret and want at the same time. She wanted to go up to her mother and brag about her amazing husband and tell stories of how magnificent Velaris is, to tell her how her little girl was Princess of the most beautiful city she had ever seen and was close friends with the most powerful Fae and Illyrians in the history of time.

With a bow of the head and a warm smile, Annona left the room, Cassian trailing after her, and went to get ready for meeting her mother for the first time for five centuries.

* * *

Annona had just gotten into the bath when Cassian insisted on coming in with her to "give another shot at getting his lovely wife pregnant." At first she just wanted to have a soothing bath, and at first, it was. They sat silently enjoying the warm water and each other's company, but as things always did, it turned, and they indeed got in another shot of getting her pregnant.

After the cozy bath, Annona went straight to her closet to try and find a black mourning dress. From memory, she had only three of them, two casual ones and one formal one. She had only worn one of them once to mourn a miscarriage one of the kindest faeries in Velaris had.

She had to dig deep into her closet to find the simple black mourning dress. It was beautifully simple, the hem of the skirt had elegant lace designs and the top had sleeves that went down for her wrist that were covered with the same lace. While it wasn't fit for the warm climate of Spring, it would work since she couldn't find the other one and the formal one was a bit too formal with the beading and large skirt that required a huge petticoat.

Cassian had smiled sadly at her when she emerged from the closet. "You look lovely in that dress," he said, guiding her to sit down at the vanity and started to brush her hair. She had only been able to get him to do that after the first century of being married. "Though I don't want to see you in it again any time soon."

A couple of minutes after he started brushing her hair, she pushed him away and started braiding it up into a crown around her head. She was indecisive about adding her most casual and favorite tiara that was made out of a few precious crystals and the diamond that had been on her wedding ring.

Cassian walked up to her and placed his hands on her shoulders, his rough callouses brushing against her soft skin. "You want to impress your mother?" he said, and she smiled and nodded with a short dip of her head. It was always Cassian who noticed what she was truly thinking. "Then you should wear it. Maybe you should wear your Couronne d'Honneur, now that would set an example of who you are."

Couronne d'Honneur, Crown of Honor. That was the most extravagant piece of jewelry she had ever seen. It was massive and heavy. Like honestly, it had to weigh ten pounds. Thankfully she'd only worn it once for her crowning when she was officially named Princess and she could swear her neck was still strained from it. All she knew was that it was put away in some vault deep under the House, waiting to be pulled out for the crowning of the next Princess.

"I think she would pass out right then," she said, and they shared a laugh. She decided she was to wear the tiara and quickly braided it into her golden hair.

She stood up and planted a kiss on Cassian's cheek and gave him a weak hug before pulling back and gazing into his eyes.

"I'll see you, maybe tomorrow, maybe sooner." She said, smiling, hoping that she would be able to stay overnight at her mother's—and possibly her very own—estate. "If I need anything, I'll come to find you, so don't go far. Don't you go jumping over to Hybern to exact some revenge." The gleam in his eyes said he might just do that. "And don't worry too hard."

She patted his chest and left the room. She could almost hear Cassian having a fight with himself about if he should follow her or listen to her words and stay to wait for her to return. It would be worse for him to show her off, so she simply walked off the nearest balcony and slowed her descent with help of magic and winnowed as soon as she fell past the ward's limits.


	7. Chapter Seven

The sweet smell of flowers and grass wrapped around Annona as a welcome back home to her childhood home. To the place she had spent the first thirty years of her life in bliss as her mother doted on her, braiding her hair, making her clothes, singing soft, lilting songs as they meandered through the extensive gardens and into the wooded forest behind it.

When the Manor faded in from black, Annona's heart cracked. The grand Manor used to be full of light and joy, the chirping of birds accompanying the sound of the merry servants humming as they carried out their work had, but now it barely looked like the husk of its former glory.

The once near-shining stone walls were now a muted gray, the remnants of flourishing wisteria clinging to the walls. Early morning sunlight spotted through the canopy of overgrown trees covering the long gravel path leading up to the Manor. In the gardens, there were only a few plants that looked to be tended to.

With a deep steady breath, Annona mustered all the regal courage she could and took a step down the gravel path towards the staircase that leads to the sturdy oak front doors.

She thought she was going to be ready for this, she thought this would be easy. But it wasn't. The estate was in despair and Annona hadn't known. She had lived in the lap of luxury while her childhood home was falling into turmoil.

Annona reached the front door and knocked twice then waited. She was sure no one was going to answer the door and was ready to knock again, but the door was opened to show a plump blue-skinned servant, her hair done up delicately around the crown of her head, a few flowers weaved in. Her eyes widened and she fell into a bow.

"Lady Regent!" she said and beamed at Annona when she straightened.

Annona smiled, a white-gloved hand coming to rest on her chest. "Is Mother here? I would love to speak to her."

The servant looked taken aback by the formality and her hazel eyes flicked to the tiara sitting atop her head then at the delicate diamond earrings looped through her ears and at the shape and flow of the skirt.

"Yes, Her Ladyship is here." She said, stepping aside to let Annona in. "She has been waiting for your arrival."

She had to admit that the inside was far more lavish than the outside was. Pastel-colored tapestries were laid about the main hallway leading to the glass back doors giving a view of the desolate gardens.

The servant closed the door and stepped in front of Annona, gesturing to follow her.

"Miss?" Annona said after a step, the servant half-turned

"Yes, Milady?" she said, stopping in front of a light-wood door. In front of the door that Annona knew lead to the parlor, and from the sounds of breathing and heartbeats coming from inside, she knew her mother was still in her favored room. "If that's what you prefer to be called." Her eyes again drifted up to the tiara and the fine clothes.

"Just call me Annona or Nona for short." She said, and the servant bowed her head. "If you don't mind telling me, what's your name?"

Again she looked surprised, but she just rested her hand on the silver doorknob and turned it. "It's Larranne,"

Before Annona could reply, Larranne pushed the door open, the wood groaning, and bowed her head as she stepped aside. When Annona moved to look inside the room, her heart stopped dead in its track.

Her mother was sitting on a worn red couch as she always did, her back straight, her hands folded in her lap, and the layers of her black gown pooling around her feet. But her glowing green eyes were now hollowed-out and hard as she stared blankly at a spot on the floor.

Sitting in a seat across from Mother, a young-faced High Fae servant sat reading a book, one eye on the Lady, one eye on the page. She was the first to react, standing in a rush and bowing before quickly sliding out of the room.

Mother's eyes lifted to hers and the hollowed look dimmed, replaced by pure joy.

"Call if you need anything," Larranne said, closing the door leaving Annona alone in the room with her mother.

She could practically see her face still young with that fresh youth as she knelt on the carpet playing dolls as one of the servants who'd loved music played an endless stream of music for them.

"Cauldron save me," Mother said, her hand rising to rest on her barely-swollen belly and the babe that was growing inside it. "Please let it be you, Ann, and not some stupid trick."

Annona took a step forward, unaware of what else she should've done. Maybe she should've brought Cassian with her, he would've been social right away, complimenting the room and commenting on how homey it seemed.

But he wasn't here, and Annona had to pull on all of her emissary and court training to keep her nerves from shattering as she sat down beside her mother, the couch giving way as it always did, and took off her gloves.

"It's me, Mother," she said and took her mother's cold hands in hers. "I dropped everything I had planned and came as soon as I got the letter."

Mother smiled, warmth returning to her ashen cheeks. "I didn't think you would come after all these years. I didn't even think you were alive. I sent the letter addressed to my daughter, Annona Varesto, and I didn't even know if it would make it even if you were alive ." Annona squeezed her hand and Mother looked up to the tiara and tilted her head. "What did I steal you from?"

"Nothing," Annona said, drawing her mother's attention back to her eyes.

"You have a diamond tiara, Ann. You're wearing a satin gown with lace and—your gloves, they are a stunning work of stitching." She said, and Annona couldn't help but smile. Her family had never been rich. They'd had enough money to wear silk on special occasions and she had a few bits of diamond jewelry, but it was nothing like the fortune she now held.

"You must prepare for what I'm to say," she said, and Mother arched a golden eyebrow.

"I've heard rumors—" she started softly, but trailed off, more intent on hearing what her daughter had to say.

"First off, I live in the Night Court," Mother paled and Annona could smell the fear coming off of her. "I'm sure you've heard, but there's a city called Velaris."

Mother nodded. "It was the hidden home of the High Lord that no one knew of until Hybern attacked. Right?"

Annona squeezed her hand if only to center herself. "Well, after the War I was taken there for sanctuary and picked up a career as a musical theater actress and lived a successful life doing that." The farther she went, the more pride that gleamed in her mother's eyes. "Then I met a wonderful man. Well, if I have to tell the truth, his friends forced him to say hello to me. He was so nervous." A shared laugh. "After a couple of decades, he finally came out and told me he loved me and we've been together ever since."

Mother started, her eyes were so bright and full of so much joy it was hard to comprehend. "He has to be rich and handsome, correct? Come on Ann! Don't leave me hanging."

She smiled at the normality her mother had just shown, so much different to the pale husk of a woman she was moments before. "He is the General of the Night Court armies." She said, and her mother's eyes widened and filled with fear, but she could see the active fight her mother was having to stay calm and hear the end of the story.

She continued, "So we married and the wedding was the grandest thing I've ever seen. It was in the middle of nowhere, fields of flowers spreading out around us as far as the eye could see. I have to say, it was the best day of my life. You would've loved it." The joy of it started to climb up her throat. "I grew so close with the High Lord in those times I've known my husband and he trusted me so much that he named me Princess of Velaris and my husband the Prince."

Mother was so still that Annona had to search her eyes for an answer but all she found was confusion. "You're a princess," she said, mostly to herself, "married to a deadly warrior."

Annona put her hand on her mother's bicep and squeezed it, looking deeply in her depth-less green eyes. "I am a deadly warrior, Mother."

Mother pulled away and stood up, her black gown hissing, and started to pace the cream-colored carpet, her hand on her belly. Annona could hear her heart beating from where she sat.

She'd just said the wrong thing. She just fucked this up. If she just kept her mouth shut—

Those thoughts weren't any good. Cassian had told her once that if her family doesn't love her for who she is, then they weren't worth her time. Maybe he was telling the truth, but she couldn't fathom leaving her mother again.

At a loss for words, Annona stood up and offered, "I can go get Cassian, my husband." Mother spun towards her, fear wafting off of her. "If you want, of course. This is still your estate, this is your home."

She didn't think her mother would say anything, but she nodded with a slight dip of the head and continued pacing.

"I'll see if I can find him. He may be busy, though," she said, and at the absent nod from her mother she started out of the room, pushing the door open silently but before she could close it, her mother spoke up.

"This is your home too, Ann. You're my daughter and Lady Regent, you and your friends are always welcome here. Bring the High Lord if you please," Annona could hear the strain in her mother's voice, knew that she was afraid of letting anyone from the Night Court into her home that she had lived in for over six centuries, let alone the Dark Lord and his most trusted court.

"I'm sure if they ever came you would love them all." She said, and Mother faced the opposite wall, leaving Annona with her back.

She closed the door and rolled her shoulders, trying to release some of the tension that had built up. Mother was trying to understand and Annona knew that, but it was still difficult. She didn't approve of her marrying a Night Court male or being a warrior, but she was her mother, she would look past that. At least, that's what she hoped.

Maybe she will love Cassian, maybe she will hate him with everything in her and only tolerate him because he's married to her daughter. If that was the case, Annona just hoped Mother could learn to like him, learn to see the kindness in his heart and see that he had no limits to what he would do for those he loved.

"Leaving so early, Milady?" the High Fae servant asked quietly, standing a few feet away from Annona, her honey-colored hands folded in front of her. She spun towards the Fae and offered a hint of a smile, brushing away her thoughts to the back of her mind.

"I will be back, I am just going to get my husband." She said, and the Fae nodded, leading her to the front door, and pulled it open. Annona was one step down the stone stairs, but she turned to the servant and she stopped closing the door and raised an eyebrow.

"How may I help?" she asked, and Annona looked her over. She was able to sneak up on Annona, which Cassian could hardly do, and was still in such a primal way that screamed fighter. If only…If only—

"Are you a fire-wielder?" Annona asked, and the woman's eyebrows furrowed but she gave a short nod. "And you heard my mother and I speaking earlier." Her mouth fell open, ready to refute the claim, but the shine in her eyes said otherwise, so Annona cut in. "The Night Court needs fire-wielders and if you are willing, my husband and I will train you for free. You can choose where to do it if you don't feel safe in the Night Court."

She didn't say anything for a moment and Annona was sure she was going to refuse, but instead, she said, "My name is Jessaphine and there would be no greater honor than to be trained by you, Your Highness."

Annona smiled, bowed her head, and winnowed back home—

She winnowed in right above a balcony and slowly fell, landing lightly on the stone. The glass double-doors were left open, the breeze from outside ruffling the thin curtains framing it. Rhysand sat inside on a large blue couch littered in pillows, Feyre sitting beside him, her head on his shoulder and her hand on his thigh, as they read through some kind of report.

Rhysand's eyes flickered up to Annona when she stepped through the door, Feyre following his gaze sitting straight and retracting her hand. "That bad?" Rhysand asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Actually," Annona said, the gloves in her hand disappearing into her room, "it went very well." She smiled, and Feyre and Rhysand echoed it. "Is Cassian still here?"

"The last I checked he said he was going to be in his room reading over some reports Azriel gave him from the Windhaven camp to prepare going there soon," Rhys said, and Annona nodded.

She was at the archway leading to the hallway when she turned around to look at Rhys. He raised his eyebrow but didn't say anything. "One of my mothers," She winced, "my servants, is a fire-wielder and she seems to have past training. I know this may be a lot to ask, but if she agrees to be trained here, can she stay here?"

Rhysand lifted his hand and gestured around him. "This is your city. If you want to bring her here, tell me and I will have a room ready."

"Thank you," she said, and Rhysand bowed his head. "Oh, and Feyre," she said, and Feyre perked up, raising her eyebrows. "Do you think you can make some paintings for my estate? Right now everything is falling apart and it needs some light."

Feyre beamed, hardly staying in her seat. "Yes! Yes, of course." She sprung to her feet, dragging Rhys along with her, the papers forgotten. He was smiling so widely as he watched his mate. "I need to go get them. They're all at the townhouse."

Annona clapped her hands and took a step back as Feyre dragged Rhys to the balcony. "It's a date then!" Annona called, "Everyone already has the day off and I need help bringing the Manor back to its former glory. Though I think we should leave Amren, my mother will piss herself if she crosses her."

Amusement danced in Rhysand's eyes. "Good call,"

"Try to tone down your…" She waved at him, at the smirk that spread across his lips he knew exactly what she meant. In seconds, Rhys and Feyre were in the air flying towards the townhouse and Annona told the shadows that skirted along the walls following her to find Azriel, tell him to find Mor and to come to the parlor and to wear their most respectable clothes because they were going to meet her mother.


	8. Chapter Eight

Cassian was shocked when she'd walked into their bedroom, saying that he wasn't expecting her back for another couple hours at least. He was sitting on one of the plush armchairs in the corner, a stack of papers on the table beside him, looking completely and utterly bored as he read and re-read the same sentence over and over again.

As soon as she told him to get dressed because he was going to meet her mother, he started to sweat and pace, speaking a hundred words a minute as he dressed in simple black pants and top, asking if her mother would like him, asking what to address her as. She had to cut him off before he started asking what she liked in her tea.

She'd forced him to sit down at the vanity to let her do something to his hair. He glowered at his reflection as she started pulling a small braid into his hair, but she started to hum, and his expression softened as he watched her work in the mirror.

Braiding back a small piece of hair, she wove it into a small bun, leaving the other half of his dark hair to brush against his shoulders as he liked it.

"See, just a braid." She'd said, and he'd pursed his lips and mouthed it's just a braid, before kissing her and thanking her for doing his hair.

They then walked to the parlor where Mor and Azriel waited, in their own space on opposite sides of the room. Mor was sitting on the couch, her hair falling in billowing curves around her face and wore a simple black dress in the same make of her normal flowing red gossamer dress, though the gold was replaced with silver. Azriel was leaning up against the far wall, his eyes on Mor, wearing much similar clothes to Cassian and his hair was combed and done nicely.

"Are Rhys and Feyre coming?" Mor asked, standing up at Annona and Cassian's arrival.

"Yes," she said and craned her neck to look outside. "They had to go to the townhouse to grab some things and get changed."

Azriel looked over to Annona then at Cassian, his eyes going straight to the braid. A smile tugged on Azriel's lips and he looked down at the floor to try and hide the smile, the shadows growing thicker around his form.

Cassian crossed his arms and looked down at Annona, and mimed just a braid again. She stuck her tongue and turned to look at Mor. "Don't you like the braid?"

For the first time in what felt like forever, Cassian's cheeks bloomed in color. Mor grinned. "It's fancy,"

Annona patted Cassian's shoulder. "See, it's just fancy."

"_Fancy_," Cassian said as if he had never spoken the word in his life. She patted his shoulder again, smiling up at him with all her teeth on show.

"_Fancy_," she said and stepped away as Feyre and Rhys landed on the roof, hardly making a sound. Rhys's eyes went straight to the single braid in Cassian's hair and he opened his mouth to speak but Cassian let out a growl.

"He's being sensitive about his baby braid," Annona said as an answer to her husband's behavior. She skipped away from Cassian before he could start arguing to her about the stupid braid that, frankly, Annona loved.

"I like it," Feyre cut in, smiling. Her dress was a simple black, no accessories or embroidery save for the whorls on the belt framing her waist, the skirt falling to the middle of her calf. Her burnished-gold hair laid in loose curls on her shoulder and a small diadem sat on her head, a black jewel set in the middle.

Unlike Feyre, Rhys wore no crown or marker of his position, but the shafts of darkness that seemed to emanate from him said enough. He wore his normal suit jacket but was a rich black that seemed to be made out of shadows itself.

"Ready?" she asked, and they both nodded so she turned to Mor and Azriel and held out her hand out to relay she wanted to winnow them and went to the balcony, where she went to winnow them to her estate.

* * *

It took three trips to get everyone to her estate since no one knew where it was. They all stood on the gravel path glancing around at the desolate gardens and faraway forest. The first reaction she was able to glimpse was the way Cassian looked at the husk of a garden, his lips pulling down.

She'd told him grand stories of her childhood home, about the abundant gardens full of fresh plants and herbs that the cooks would use for every meal.

The oak doors groaned as they opened to show Lorranne, bright-faced and cheerful, but her eyes dimmed when they landed on the High Lord. Her skin paled and she fell into a bow, her eyes shifted between Rhysand and Annona.

Taking control of the situation, Annona took a step forward, Lorranne's eyes going to her. Everyone stayed still, waiting for Annona's orders.

"Lady Regent," Lorranne said, bowing for the second time. Annona turned and held out her arm for Cassian and obliged by letting her loop her arm through his.

"Is Mother still in the parlor?" Annona said stepping forward, everyone taking a collective step with her as they kept going along the path.

Lorranne nodded. "She hasn't left, Milady."

Annona pushed away from the worry that pressed in on her chest, and with the glimmer in Cassian's eyes, she knew he understood why she needed him here with her. Why she couldn't do it by herself.

They reached the top of the steps and Lorranne was near-white as she stepped aside to let him in, the smell of fear wafting off of her. Even though everyone noticed it, no one said anything. Lorranne only led them down the hallway, her frail bones practically shaking as she grabbed the silver doorknob and turned it, pushing open the door.

Before Annona entered, she told Lorranne, "Can you have Jessaphine come? I need to speak to her." Lorranne nodded and let out a relieved breath and stumbled back a step, ready to leave this hallway where so many powerful people stood. "Take a break, I can take care of our guests, I know my way around enough."

Lorranne left with a deep brow, a smile on her lips. Cassian squeezed her arm reassuringly and they stepped into the room to see Mother standing by the wide window, her hands fidgeting in front of her stomach. When she saw Cassian, her hand instantly went to her belly as if she were protecting the babe inside.

"Mother," Annona said as a greeting, bowing her head as she stepped to the side to allow her friends to come in. Mor came in first, smiling widely at the Lady. The smell of fear started to permeate the air.

Azriel came into the room, going straight to the wall beside the door and leaned up against the wall, his shadows nowhere to be seen. By the way he held himself it seemed he was trying to tone down his imposing nature. Rhys and Feyre on the other hand…

They could never be toned down, no matter how normal they seemed when they entered the room. Hand-in-hand, lover's smiles on their faces and no dark seeping from Rhysand. They were power and nothing they could do would ever change that.

Lady Alera bowed, cleared her throat, and started rubbing her hands together. She always did that when she was thinking of something to say.

"Mother, this is my husband, Cassian," Annona spoke up, gesturing with her head to the winged-male whose arm was ringed through hers.

Cassian stepped forward and took her mother's hand, brought it to his lips and kissed it as he bowed. "It's a pleasure to finally meet the mother of my lovely wife."

Mother smiled, the fear melting from her eyes as she looked between Cassian and Annona. The fear was washed away and swallowed by pride, to see how much Annona's eyes glowed when she looked at her husband. She knew at that moment that her daughter was safe, even if only because her husband would protect her.

"The pleasure is all mine," Mother said, the fear turning back to her eyes when she changed her focus to the High Lord.

Rhysand didn't give the fear any more time to brew, knowing how dangerous that could, so he gestured to Feyre.

"My High Lady, wife, and precious mate, Feyre," he said, love gleaming in his eyes as Feyre bowed her head. Here, they were just friends of Annona's, coming to spend time with her mother. He gestured to Azriel, seeing that he wasn't intending on speaking, "Azriel, my Spymaster."

Mother nodded slowly as she tried to comprehend everything.

Mor stepped forward, a wide and bright smile on her lips. "I'm Morrigan, one of Ann's best friends and the most stylish person in her life."

The tension eased as it always did when Mor spoke up. She walked up beside Mother and looked out the window with her, pointing out a large weeping willow, saying how she'd always wanted to live on an estate with one.

Annona smiled up at Cassian as he came back to her side and his eyes flashed in worry when a wave of dizziness rushed through her and wrapped its clawed hand around her head. _No_, she told it, trying to will it to release its hold. She was here, with her mother and with her friends, she couldn't succumb to visions. Not now, not today, hopefully not ever.

She reached her hand out to brace herself against Cassian, not caring that she grabbed onto his chest before her head fell up against his shoulder. He tensed underneath her and wrapped an arm around her waist and used the other one to grab the hand she had placed on his chest.

"Ann?" Mother's worry-stricken voice said, "What's wrong with her?"

"She's okay," Cassian said, more to himself than anything, squeezing her tight against his chest, keeping her empty hand folded between her chest and his.

He thought she was in a vision and he was holding her so that she wouldn't summon any knife while she was in front of her mother. She wasn't in a vision yet, though it was seeping into her every sense. Whispering voices were floating around her head and the candle-lit fabric walls of a war tent were flashing in front of her eyes as if she was seeing two different layers of a world.

"Tell me what's happening with my daughter!" Mother yelled, the sound of her raising so foreign to the soft and sweet person she was. But Annona knew that it was worry that was overtaking her mother, worry that her only living child, save for the babe growing inside her, was suffering.

"It's trauma, from the war," Rhysand said, and Annona didn't know if that's what he truly thought it was, or if he was saying that to comfort her mother. "She'll be fine, she just needs a bit."

"How long is a bit?" Mother asked, her voice more hushed but just as powerful. A worried mother.

"Sometimes a minute, sometimes an hour." He paused, the silence palpable. "Sometimes longer."

Fear wracked through Annona and she convulsed so fast and hard that it took Cassian off guard and she staggered out of his reach. A dagger was instantly in her hand, the cold leather of the ornate hilt biting into her skin.

Longer than an hour! She was furious about that, she could feel her magic hum and smooth along her bones, rallying to attack. How long had she kept Cassian up at night? How much of a day had she unknowingly jumped? But most of all, how did she not know that that much time passed?

Without her knowing, her magic lashed out, thinning the air of the room. She didn't even notice, not until she heard the hard and raspy breaths of her mother as she tried to hold back a sob, holding onto her swollen belly.

Mor grabbed onto Lady Alera, sobs starting to wrack through her, and guided her out of the room or to wherever the air was plentiful and rich.

"Crap," Rhys said while Cassian rushed forward and ripped the dagger from her hand, throwing it to the ground. "She's never touched her magic during her flashbacks before."

Flashbacks, so that's what they thought these visions were. Honestly, that made sense, but only if they'd ask her. Maybe they were worried that if they did ask she would have another flashback or would start crying and have to speak about dying.

Her family was only caring for her, trying to make sure she was safe while she suffered these flashbacks. She couldn't blame them. They loved her and were only looking after her.

With her anger bubbling away to nothing, the air returned to normal and Cassian breathed in deeply, pulling her to his chest and folding both her hands in between them so that she didn't have another opportunity to summon another weapon.

"Maybe it's an extra bad one," Cassian said, taking a slow step back. Her body moved as if it were a doll, following his every step and move as he lead her to the couch.

"Maybe," Rhysand said, Feyre standing in the center of the room, her arms crossed in front of her chest and Azriel nowhere to be seen. Knowing him, he was probably moving across the grounds to make sure her magic hadn't activated anywhere else.

The vision started to become more visible as it pushed in on her mind, the view of a rough wooden littered with maps, pieces of small rock sitting on it in place of army markers. At least the map she had written was accurate.

Still, she pushed against it. She didn't want to hear the sorrow-filled words of another queen or Fae warrior. She needed to get out and be here with her friends. She didn't want to be the burden she had turned into with these visions.

Cassian helped Annona sit down on the couch and he stared at her ever-open eyes, silver lining his hazel-green eyes.

His eyes searched her face and landed on hers and they stayed there. They widened and Cassian's mouth fell open a couple of times before he finally found his words, "She's still here," he said, his voice hardly a whisper.

"What?" Rhysand asked, coming to stand beside Cassian and looked at Annona's eyes. She couldn't move them, couldn't close them. She had no control of her body at all.

"Her eyes," Cassian said, and he lifted his hand to her cheek, the feeling sending a wave of warmth through her that pooled at her center. "I can still see her in them."

Rhysand didn't say anything, he just looked to Cassian, waiting for him to continue. "Normally she's all gone like she isn't even in her body anymore. But I… I just know she's still in there."

That was it. When she heard the break in his voice, she couldn't do it anymore. It took everything in her, every bit of mind shield training to hack her way out of the tight hold this half-vision was holding her in. With a flinch, Annona pushed out of it, leaving that sad-looking war tent behind.

Cassian turned to her quickly and so did Rhysand, both of their eyes widening.

Warm tears started to fall down her cheeks, her eyes fluttering closed. She didn't have to say anything. Maybe Rhysand didn't understand it, but Cassian did. His arms wrapped around her and pulled her close, peppering the place between her shoulder and neck with light, thankful kisses.


	9. Chapter Nine

It had taken Annona a couple of minutes to gather herself and to stop the tears from falling. All the while Cassian held her in his arms, telling her over and over again that she was safe and held her so tight she wanted to believe him.

Those moments when she was trapped between the vision and the real word had started to haunt her from the second it finished. The way Cassian watched her as she finally left the parlor to meet with her mother and Jessaphine outside, she knew he was worried for her and wanted to help her through whatever she was dealing with. But he also knew that time would come later when they were alone in a room where they could talk and she could cry for hours without having to do anything.

He told her he was going to talk with Azriel and would meet her outside as soon he could before he started down a hallway leading to a comfortable living room and office. One of the servants had probably settled Azriel into one of them to do whatever he did and told Cassian through the shadows to find him there.

Annona wasn't ready to go outside and be formal and… What was she saying? This was her mother and she could be relaxed around her. She could be herself around Mor and Amren, so she could be comfortable around the woman who gave birth to her and carefully raised her through the first thirty years of her life.

She pushed open the glass door to the back gardens and was sad to not be wrapped in the smell of flowers as she used to. Her magic reached out to the nearest bunch of flowers, dead and sitting in a large ceramic pot at the bottom of the stairs, the sparks sitting at the base of the plant, waiting to be called to action.

When she stood beside it, her hands, guided by the will of her magic, reached out to one of the frail and brown-ish leaves and pressed a light finger to the tip of it.

A humming golden mass erupted at her center and glided along her bones in a warm embrace, stretching down her arm and to her fingertips then into the broken leaves. They came alive in a bright shade of green, small purple and blue flowers sprouted from the center as they twisted and stretched towards the warm sun.

"I always knew your magic would be strong," Mother said behind Annona.

She didn't turn, partly because she was still working on the flowers, partly because she was too worried to face her mother and see the worry that her eyes held.

"This part isn't really helpful on the battlefield, though." She said, and with a deep breath, she turned. Instead of the worry that she expected to see, pride was written all over her mother's face as she looked down at her only daughter.

"It's nothing like I can do," she said and looked to the plant. "At best I can ripen an apple."

"Magic is strange like that," Annona said smiling and started walking into the garden, running her hand along the dead hedges and flower bushes. Life awoke in her wake and color started to explode through the garden as she channeled her magic through the ground to the farther side of the garden.

She could hear Cassian and… Mor walking behind her on light feet, obviously trying to surprise her, but she acted as if she didn't know.

Mother was so happy, watching the blooming plants in pure awe, a huge grin on her lips and her eyes were lighting up. A hand rested on her swollen belly as she traced patterns over the material.

"You will be an amazing Head of House, Ann," Mother said, looking over at her daughter admirably. Cassian and Mor's steps slowed and Mor whispered that she was going to see where Rhys and Feyre were then she fell away.

"Maybe," Annona said, picking a flower that she'd just grown and twisted it in her fingers. The small petals were a stunning shade of light blue, the edges turning more into a black.

Mother raised an eyebrow, urging her to continue speaking, "First off, I would have to section my time between the people I serve in Velaris and the people I serve here. That's the easy part," She rested the flower back in the bush and continued to sprout more sweet-smelling flowers. "But then I'm going to need heirs. One for Velaris, one for here." Cassian's steps faltered.

"You and—Cassian are planning on having children?" Mother asked, unable to keep the hopeful tone from her voice.

"We're trying as of yesterday," Annona said and Mother stopped to pull Annona into a hug and kissed her cheek.

"That's amazing! Maybe the Mother can bless you with a gift and have this little one grow up with their niece or nephew." She placed her hand on her stomach for emphasis.

"I hope so too." Annona glanced over to Cassian standing only a couple of passes away. "We hope so,"

Mother's head swung towards him and she let out a frightened yelp and brought her hand up to hand to hide the blush growing there.

"Sorry," Cassian said walking up to Annona. He wrapped his arm around her waist and gave her a feather-light kiss.

"Is that normal—your husband sneaking up on you?" Mother asked, regaining her courtly composure as she looked between the two of them, joy in her eyes.

"He tries," she said, smiling up at him. "But I always notice him first." Cassian gave a sheepish nod of confirmation before they started down the path again, flowers blooming to life without her even touching the plants.

Annona looked over her shoulder to look at the house and the bright roses that started to grow on the vines crawling up the pale stone bricks. She still had the bricks to repair, but this was a start.

* * *

Cassian stayed at the Manor with Annona for two full days, the rest of the Inner Circle having left later that evening to return to Velaris and get work done. Cassian and Annona spent their time walking through the newly flourishing gardens with Lady Alera, telling stories about what they did for work, including Annona's two hundred years of musical theater acting, and how they met.

After the second day, seeing that Annona hadn't had any more visions—or flashbacks as everyone else called them—Cassian had felt she was safe enough to head back to Velaris and actually get some work done by heading up to an especially unruly Illyrian camp with Rhys and Azriel that had hordes of males revolting and straight-up cutting the female's wings off.

The thought sent disgusted shivers through her body, putting her on edge for the rest of the day. She'd wanted to go with Cassian but he said she should enjoy a little more time relaxed with her mother since he thought this was just the beginning of something huge brewing in the mountains.

Reluctantly, she agreed, deciding that she would spend one more day with her mother, get to know Jessaphine a bit, then head to Helion's before she would head home and finally get back to work.

It all worked well; Jessaphine agreed to come to Velaris to train, but only after another servant could replace her. Annona kissed her mother on the cheek, hugged her, savoring the soft smell of her favorite lavender oils and winnowed away to the Day Court Royal Palace—

Annona had made the right decision by wearing one of her favorite gauzy blue gowns. It was warm, sweltering if she had to be honest. The sky was bright and full of beautifully perfect fluffy clouds. While the Night Court had their amazing nights and stars, the Day Court had stunning days full of sun and bright fluffy clouds no matter the season.

That sun shone down directly on the Palace. It was similar to the Dawn Court Palace in the way that it had many towers that were all connected with bridges of rich tan-colored stones. Glass-paned windows were flung wide open to show small study areas and empty sleeping chambers made and ready for their owner to return. Spices wafted on the wind, flowing through the gardens and down the stone path to where Annona stood.

This palace brought back so many memories from when she would visit for months at a time to help build ties to the Night Court. Being allies with the Day Court doesn't come easily, especially when their High Lord is a master at knowledge.

A bell rang as she took her first step down the path, marking the hour. Twelve times. Noon. So the smell of spices wasn't just a feature.

Halfway down the path, the doors to the palace opened to show Helion and one his servants standing beside him.

He looked the same as he did when she'd seen him last on the battlefield during the final battle, only now he wore his normal white dress-robe-thing and had no blood to be seen. He wore a spiked crown, much the smaller one to the display piece he wore during the High Lord meeting.

"Ann!" he called out, throwing his arms out in the air as he started towards her. She smiled and bowed. "You are looking fine as always."

Straightening, she smiled at him and replied, "Charming, as always," before she hurried to his side where they continued into the cool indoors of the palace.

"You can't flirt with me anymore. I'm a married female and princess." She said once they had walked through the carefully engraved doorway, her voice playful and light. She didn't have to be formal around Helion, at least not when it was just the two of them. If it was a meeting though, she had to act like any other professional.

He smirked down at her as they turned down a hallway, his dark-skinned servant breaking off to go the opposite way. "That's never stopped you before." He said, his hand reaching out to brush hers.

It wasn't any secret that he wanted her. She was probably the only female he'd ever wanted that never slept with him. Though she knew he was always going to pine after her, he wouldn't ever force himself upon her or seduce her. And she would never stray from her husband, she loved him too much.

She side-eyed him and he put his hands palm up in surrender. "Got it, no flirting with the beautiful girl in the crown."

Because Annona had worn one of her more impressive crowns, an extravagant work of steel and diamonds twisted around her head to look like a halo of light upon her golden head.

They continued down the hall towards the grand library Annona knew was only a minute away. The increasing amount of heavily armed guards was a good give away.

Turning down another hallway so many guards lining the hall it was a wonder anyone could afford to have all of them, Helion spoke up, "What did you want to come and look at?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Umm," she said to stall while she gathered her thoughts or to push aside that dozens of guards were surrounding them. She couldn't exactly say she wanted to figure out if she was glimpsing into another world or if she was simply crazy. "Ancient Fae stories and myths." At his raised eyebrow she added, "Old royal lines that aren't well documented, weird magic, anything like that."

"Hmm," he said, amusement glinting in his amber eyes. "You've always been a strange woman."

After casting the High Lord a murderous look, he raised his hands in surrender again as they stopped in front of a towering oak door two guards standing at each side. They both bowed to their High Lord. The door was quickly pulled open and a young High Fae with the dark burnished skin of Day stood in the doorway, her eyes wide as she beheld the High Lord.

She quickly bowed and her eyes kept dancing between Annona and Helion, unsure of who she was and whom to address.

"I'm so sorry, High Lord!" the girl said, "Do you need any help?"

"I'm sure we can deal on our own," Helion said smiling at the young librarian. She bowed and scuttled out of the way and down the hall, leaving the door open. Helion gestured to the grand library, "Ladies first,"

* * *

The library hadn't changed since the last time she had been in it. It was a grand two-story room that seemed to be endless, the farthest bookshelves falling into shadows, not even one of the many librarians or scholars caring to the light the candles nearby.

Everything smelled like old books and leather, the books, the desks, the seats, even the ink that was stored here. It was a miracle everyone that went in here didn't go leaving smelling like they've lived in a library their whole life.

"Everything you need is on the second floor in the back." He said and started leading her to the large staircase leading to the second level.

There was a plush velvet carpet leading up the stairs, making Annona's steps even quieter than they normally were.

When she had stayed at the palace she would visit the library once a day normally for hours at a time to study the ways of Prythian and court intrigue even she already knew more than the average courtier or adviser. At that point, she'd still been new to being Princess, not even a decade in, and was striving to be the best she could be. And this was the perfect place, with endless books on any possible thing she could ever need. At first, Helion had told her she was crazy, in between him flirting, of course, but later commended her on her persistence.

Once at the top of the stairs, the area turned into a large reading and sitting area. Many fairies in varied colored robes sat at a long candle-lit table, piles of books around them, reading or writing.

All of their eyes turned toward the High Lord and Annona. Some of them looked back down to their work, too invested in their work to pay too much attention to their High Lord, though Helion didn't seem to mind. He just glanced down at Annona and smiled.

"Anyone want to assist the regal and enchanting Annona, Princess of Velaris?" he said, calling on the scholars sitting at the table. Looks like there was no being here under the radar. As three scholars stood up, Helion bent down and whispered, "Sorry, but I have a meeting I have to get to. I'll find you after."

He took a step away from her and gestured to a red-skinned faerie, her hair falling over her shoulders in a sheet of silky black. Her eyes lit up as she bowed.

"Take care of Ann, will you." He said and told the red-skinned faerie what section to bring Annona to before he turned away and left down the stairs. The faerie quickly bowed and gestured for her to follow.

So she did, through stacks and stacks of books, not slowing her speed once as she maneuvered through them. As they passed unlit sconces, they flickered to life. Not by any spell or magic in the library itself, but from the faerie. Finally, they got to a far corner of the library and they stopped in front of a large bookshelf full of large and imposing books.

"Legends and myths?" she said, looking over the books. "What exactly do you need?"

She told the scholar what she needed and the faerie nodded, telling Annona to sit down in one of the nearby alcoves and wait for her. Annona followed her words and found herself seated in an already lit alcove sitting on a cushioned bench in front of a bare table. That faerie was quite talented with fire-wielding.

Soon the faerie returned with a stack of books up to her chin and she dumped the books on the table, the wood grunting under the weight. She shook out her hands and bowed.

"I'll go see if I can find anything on weird magic." She said, turning to go back into the stacks, but Annona raised her hand and she stopped, raising a polite eyebrow.

"You're a fire-wielder," she said, and the faerie nodded. "The Night Court needs fire-wielders. If you want, I can train you. No cost, all food and sleeping accommodations on me."

The girl smiled. "I'll think about it."

"Good," Annona said, "If you decide you want to come, tell Helion to send me a letter. Tell him to mark it as urgent."

She nodded eagerly and seeing that Annona wasn't going to say anymore her lithe form quickly disappeared behind the stacks of books.

Sighing, Annona picked the first book off of the stack. Kings and Queens of Old. It was a book that gathered all different legends about old noble families put into one book. Effectively cutting out all the lies. Or so the author claimed.

After flipping through the pages and going through the whole stack of books, not finding anything of interest, she waited for the faerie to return. And when she did, another huge stack of books was in her hands. Placing them down, her eyes moved to the discarded stack of books.

"Nothing?" she asked, arching a fine black brow.

Annona shook her head and the faerie picked up the discarded stack and hauled it back to wherever she got them to put them away.

These next books were interesting, to say the least. So much so that if the wrong person got their hands on them, say the King of Hybern or any his cronies, nothing good could ever come from it. It seemed there was a reason for Helion to have kept it so protected. The only library not touched by Amarantha.

It took going through three books to find one that could be useful. The name was written in a language that not even Annona could read even though she prided herself on being able to read almost every spoken and written language, common or rare.

Flipping through the pages, a savage curiosity sprouted in her.

Out of the sparse words she could understand, it was about blood magic. A cruel and brutally powerful set of runes made out of blood that when clustered together could create a monstrous spell. They could open doors to other worlds, rid people of magic, create absurd barriers to capture and hold a creature of any power still for as long as needed.

It was… exactly what she was looking for if the onslaught of dizziness had anything to say about it. This time she didn't fall into a vision, but her whole body stilled and surrendered to a different being. Her hand moved without her willing it. It flipped through what had to be a hundred pages before it landed on a page and she started reading.

It started reading. Whoever had her body, whoever was possessing her knew how to read this arcane book. The information poured into her mind: _The wyrdgate is the most powerful and hardest use of the wyrdmark magic. If you don't know the world you would like to enter, opening a gate could be severely dangerous and is not recommended under any circumstance, no matter how desperate._

Like a rubber band, she snapped back into her body and read the same paragraph but yielded no information. Whatever that was, it seemed like the only way she was able to understand the book.

"That book?" Helion asked, walking up to the alcove, his dark eyebrows lifting as he sat on the other side of the tabler and shoved aside the stack of books with a wave of a hand so he could see her. An easy feat of magic she could easily pull off if she pleased.

He leaned over the table to look at the page. "No one has been able to read it. Not even my magic can unravel it. It refuses to."

Annona eyebrows furrowed as she looked at the scramble of words. It was so close to a language she could read yet it was just out of reach. Like a long-forgotten memory.

"I can understand a bit of it." She said, picking up a loose paper on the table and shoving it on the page to mark it.

"Hmm?" He pulled the book toward himself and flipped through the pages. "I can't make out one word." A smirk played on his lips. "Strange woman indeed."

He slid the book back to her and she closed it, a puff of dust coming out of it. It was quickly dragged away by some magic holding the library.

"Can I borrow it, then?" she asked, and Helion paused, waved his hand and another copy of the book appeared.

"Have the original," He grinned, grabbing the one he'd just summoned. "A gift so that when you end up deciphering it you will tell me what it's about."

She smiled. "Deal."

* * *

Annona hugged Helion as she wished him goodbye, but before she could winnow away he held a book out a thick leather-bound book to her. The language of the title made it look like it was written by a fledgling. Thankfully, she could easily read the language and title: _Faits de Fée Perdus._ The title was… less eloquent than its counterpart seemed: _Lost Faerie Facts_.

Helion tapped the book. "There's a lot of interesting things I didn't know in there." He said, the gravel crunching under his feet as he shifted. "A gift—from an old friend."

"Thanks, Helion," she said, fanning through the pages. "I'll read it as soon as I can."

Helion's smile was feral as he planted a kiss on her cheek, a kind goodbye from a friend. She could tell that the peck on her cheek was anything but a romantic gesture because she knew every romantic gesture he could ever perform.

"See you soon," she said as she bowed to him before she slid the books into a dark pocket and winnowed back home to the House of Wind.

* * *

_**Somewhere in the Illyrian Steppes**_

Cassian stood at the edge of an Illyrian war camp, looking out at the snow-blasted mountains of the Steppes. Rustling his wings to allow the coolness of the air to settle his frayed temper.

He didn't think it was going to be this bad. When he and his brothers arrived a few females had come barreling out of worn tents, no wings in sight, obvious pain and sorrow flashing over their faces. They'd fallen to their knees and begged—begged—for Rhys to do something. To take them out of there, to kill them and end their misery, to do anything so that they wouldn't have to face the males who had chopped their wings right off.

At that moment, he was sad that Annona wasn't there. She would've been right there for them, calmed them down and talked them through whatever they were feeling and made sure they were safe and out of harm's way. Still, everything worked out. Azriel winnowed them out to the Windhaven camp and made sure the camp-mother would look after them.

When he returned all of them had been at their end. Rhys was even showing his temper, trying hard but failing to keep the darkness from his face. In the end, they got to kill the bastards that did it to those females, but it didn't feel like the proper ending. They deserved far worse.

"Cass," Azriel said as he walked up beside Cassian, looking out at the snow-covered mountains. "I have news on Annona."

That piqued his interest. Cassian looked toward his brother and raised his eyebrow, his anger sizzling out.

That damned woman always had a way to calm his anger. Just the thought of her joyous and kind self had him wishing to do nothing more than lay in bed and hold her in his arms, breathing in her scent and making sure no harm could ever come to her.

"One of my spies told me she was at the Day Court at Helion's palace." He said, and the world stilled around Cassian. Why would his wife go to Helion's, especially without telling him?

"Do you know why?" he asked, holding onto his composure. There was no need to worry. He knew his Ann, she was probably just visiting her old friend.

"I'm afraid not," Azriel said, looking out to the mountains again. Point taken, he didn't want to dig his friend her grave.

It was no secret that Cassian hated Helion. Well, Annona didn't know. He didn't let her know. Helion flirted with his wife and at first, it only bothered him a little because it was for work and the High Lord didn't know she was in any relationship. But even after their marriage had been announced at the High Lord meeting, Helion kept shamelessly flirting with her.

And of course, his kind and fearless wife had told him straight up not to flirt with her, but he could see amusement in her eyes. He didn't know what it meant, and didn't want to ask. Especially not after Helion had stopped her in the hallway outside of their rooms and spoke hushed words to her, so quiet Cassian couldn't hear.

He trusted Ann, but not Helion—never Helion.

"One thing," Azriel said, his voice quiet, no more than another wisp of a shadow that wrapped around him. "Helion greeted her personally and…"

"And what, Azriel?" Cassian snapped, turning toward his brother. He hadn't meant to snap, but just hearing that Helion—

"He flirted, and she flirted back," Azriel said so simply that it took a moment for it to truly sink in.

His wife would never-she wouldn't. She had received a letter from Helion saying he wanted to have ties with Velaris and her. Was it more than that? Did the letter say something else and she had just kept it hidden?

Cassian flexed his fingers, willing the anger to leave once again. He would speak to her once she came back to Velaris, ask why she was with Helion and she would say she was just going to have a quick meeting to make sure the alliance between the Courts is still holding.

Mother, he hoped it would be that easy.

"Tell me when she leaves," Cassian said and turned before he gave his brother time to respond and marched right back into the camp, ready to yell at some no-good bastard Illyrians.


	10. Chapter Ten

After Annona got back to the House she quickly changed into a rare pair of leggings and a loose top. She didn't want to do anything for the rest of the day but read the book Helion had given her. It seemed like it would be interesting and she could hopefully learn something from it.

The House was so quiet and she was grateful for the time and peacefulness of it because she could finally sit down in her favorite room and relax.

The very air in the room smelled like jasmine. In the small, cozy room, it was confusing as to where the smell was coming from. But Annona knew there was a certain servant that would fill the cushions in jasmine and would wash the floors with jasmine soap. No one else could handle the severity of the scent, but it calmed Annona and was one of the only places she could truly go to be alone.

So if someone wanted to see her, if she was in this room, they knew she wanted—needed—to be alone and would wait until she emerged. Sometimes Cassian did come here, but that's only when he knew she needed him.

She sat down on the couch and sighed as she sunk into the silk and velvet blankets and pulled them over her, casting a look out the window. The windows had frosted over and snow just started to fall in large fat clumps sprinkling through the sky. In the last couple of hours, it had gone from no snow what-so-ever to a thick layer of snow covering everything.

A roaring fire blazed in the stone hearth across from her, keeping the quaint room warm despite the freezing temperatures outside.

Her mind randomly jumped to thinking about her poor husband as well as Rhys and Azriel. They had to fly in this horrid weather. But they were warriors, she doubted they would be too affected by it.

Annona snuggled back down into the blankets and pulled the book out, the leather smelling rich and the papers smelling old and used, she started to read.

At first, it took her a while for her to understand any of it. She had to refresh her mind on the language but once she did, she couldn't help but be neatly fascinated with the contents.

It went on and on about how through millennia facts would shift to legends then to myths, and finally to nothing but a whisper on the wind. It made her think that she would one day be nothing but a scratch on a page depicting the history of the Night Court. She made herself push away that thought, she knew it would lead to nothing good.

Pages went by of the writer going on about the High Fae's endless abilities, how senses could be heightened by a simple thought, how their minds simply held more information and memories than that of mortals or lesser faeries. The latter would explain her extensive knowledge of languages though she had learned most of them centuries ago.

Helion was right—it was interesting. There were so many facts she didn't know of but knew to be true. One example is how every fae has immense power but only those able to handle the weight of it could harness it all. That made sense with both her parents hardly having any magic and her having the might of a High Lord's child.

She came upon an especially interesting page about mates. At first, she had thought about skipping the section completely out of not wanting memories that she had so forcefully hidden to resurface and show their face, but when she read the header: _You may have more than one mate_, she couldn't not read it.

The further she read, the slower the world around her seemed to move.

_If one mating bond is rejected and ignored, a new one will form with someone more suited to the person. This new soul-bonded pair will always find each other no matter the circumstances and will find it impossible to live apart from each other as they feel like the other person is a literal second half. With this bond being made after a mating bond is already in place, it will be ten times stronger than the normal bond. _

Her whole body was shaking by the time she finished reading it. Mate. A bond that is so special and rare that it meant everything. There was something more than that. Something deeper. Something even more coveted and rare. She couldn't imagine it. Couldn't believe that she and Cassian shared that. The person she loved beyond measure and couldn't even fathom living without could be more than a mate.

The door to the room opened to show Cassian, rustling a fine dusting of snow off of his wings as if he'd come here right from outside. He smiled when he saw her.

She felt it right then—the bond snap in place.

It was a living, breathing thing between the two of them. She could nearly see it from where it was attached to her gut, pulling her towards Cassian. It filled her with warmth, reaching to her fingertips.

Mate.

He was her mate.

She was his mate.

They were mates.

It was as if her other mating bond didn't exist; as if it had been wiped clean and ripped to shreds. Part of her wished her former mate was screaming in agony from it being broken, because she was here with a new bond so strong that she wanted to jump on him and drag him to bed—

But she pushed that need down. They were _mates_—

"I know, don't I look amazing," Cassian said, flaring out his wings and flexing his muscles. She'd been staring. She'd been staring at her _mate_.

"It's snowing," she said because what else was she supposed to say? Hey Cass, you're my mate, now let me go make a meal so you can formally accept it!

Cassian tucked his wings back in though he didn't stop admiring his muscles. "It's way worse in the Steppes," he finally said, his arms falling to his side. He leaned up against the door frame, not daring to enter the jasmine-scented room.

He gestured with his chin to the book in her hands. "What's that?"

She looked down at it and blinked, having completely forgotten its presence. "Oh," she said and closed it before she set it down on the table in front of her. "It's old facts about faeries. Things that have been forgotten over time."

Slowly, Cassian nodded and squinted as he looked at the cover of the book. "It looks like it was written by a two-year-old."

She snorted, leaning back against the warm cushions.

"It was an ass of a language to learn. Lots of the letters look the same. Not to mention the stupid grammar. It's not as bad as Illyrian though, because that one…" She said, and cut herself off once she realized she was rambling. Mother, Cassian must think she's a mess right now. Hiding in the one room no one else will go into, acting all ramble-y and nervous.

He just looked at the book. "Find anything interesting in it?"

_Yes, you're my mate._ "The power of a faerie doesn't depend on lineage, instead on the will of the wielder."

"Hmm," He tapped his foot and his wings flared with it. They rustled and pulled back in tight behind his back. "Well, I'm starving. Do you want to come? A new place just opened up and it's inside—heated."

Maybe a nice lunch—dinner?—_meal_, would be nice.

"That would be nice," she said and magicked the book away and stood only to be hit by a wave of dizziness. She clenched and unclenched her fists, willing it to subside. Her magic started rallying to reach into that dark depth of the magic pocket but she was able to push it down, the dizziness falling with it.

"—unless you can't?" Cassian said just as she regained a hold on the world.

She looked over to him and shook her head, "I'm good. Just need to get changed."

He stepped aside to let her out and swiftly passed him and started down the hallway. When she didn't hear him following after her, she spun around to see him staring blankly at her.

His hazel eyes had darkened as if a shadow had been placed over his face. She raised her eyebrows and held out her hand. "Is something wrong?"

"No," he said, his voice solemn. "I just remembered I needed to speak to Rhys about something. I'll come to get you in about twenty minutes. Good?"

Annona nodded. "All right. See you," she said and watched as he turned and started down the hallway, his steps tight and his wings tucked in as close as they could be. His shoulders were tense underneath his leathers and he was flexing his hands, the two ruby-colored Siphons glowing. He was angry about something, that was for sure. He must be damn-well itching for a fight as well if his Siphons were glowing like that, showing that his magic was pushing against his nerves to attack.

She didn't do anything, did she? Maybe he remembered some bit of information from his recent moment in the Steppes and needed to go tell Rhys before he forgot about it. It wasn't anything she did, was it?

Thinking like that wouldn't do anything good for her. He was probably just a bit ticked off from something and needed to talk it out with his brother and she couldn't blame him for that. She had some things that she only talked to Mor about and Cassian no doubt had things he only talked to his brothers about. That was normal. That was healthy.

So Annona took in a deep breath and turned to head back to her room and get ready to go out and eat with her husband.

* * *

Cassian had been half an hour. She knew she shouldn't worry, he was only ten minutes late. But he was never late. And with how worried and stressed he looked when he left… She couldn't stop herself from winnowing to the front door of Rhysand's townhouse.

After appearing in the yard in front of the townhouse she saw through the window that Cassian was pacing in the living room, a hand running through his hair, and Rhys stood in the archway, watching and consoling her husband.

As she walked up to the door, she could hear their muffled voices. Cassian's was rushed while Rhys's was slow and calm, though she couldn't make out any words. She stepped up the stairs and when she knocked on the glass door, they silenced.

Rhys's steps were slow—paced—as he walked up to the door as if to give Cassian time to think.

The door opened and Rhys offered her a playful smirk, his nostrils flaring. She was about to ask what he was smelling but his face twisted in a grimace, "You smell like that jasmine room of yours."

Annona just smiled. "Nice to see you too, Rhys."

He winked at her before stepping aside and letting her into his house and the warmth that it supplied. Annona hadn't noticed how cold it truly was outside until she came inside.

Cassian came around the corner and offered her a smile but she could still see the heavy shadow behind his eyes. And for the second time of that day, she felt the impact of the mating bond pulling her toward him. Lulling her to take him in her arms and make that darkness disappear.

She had no idea how Rhys and Feyre lived with this every day.

"Sorry, I got distracted," Cassian said, mustering a might of bravado he didn't have and looked her up and down, his eyes tracing her form that was very much hidden by the over-sized sweater and woolen boots.

"I'm here now, no need to reflect on the past." She offered him a smile, hoping that somehow the bond would magically snap in for him right then. He hadn't noticed in the last four centuries, so why would he now?

Annona looked toward Rhys before she cast a glance around the house. "Since we're all here—suspecting that Feyre is upstairs—would you two like to join us for…food?"

Rhys looked to Cassian as if for approval and looked back to Annona before nodding, gesturing to the staircase. "I'll go get her," he said and left up the stairs, leaving the two of them alone in the entrance of the house.

A string of light laughing followed the closing of the bedroom door, followed by Rhysand's low and rumbling voice, followed by silence as a shield popped into place around their bedroom.

Looking to Cassian, she raised her eyebrows and he only answered with a wild grin, some of the light returning to his eyes as he took a long stride towards her. Another step and he pulled her by the waist so that they sat flush against each other, leaving nothing but the layers of clothes and leather in between them

She looked up at him and wrapped her arms around his neck, tilting her head as she looked into his eyes.

The lift of his lips and a playful glint in his eyes were an impressive facade, so much so that she could hardly tell he was feeling anything out of the normal. She could tell her warrior with skin of steel and a heart of gold was feeling something deeply if only for the gut-wrenching sorrow that was pulsing through the bond.

He was in pain and was hiding it from her—for what reason, she didn't know but it made her heart sink to the pit of her stomach and sit there.

"I love you—you know that, right?" he asked, real sadness filling his eyes, that facade fading away. She didn't want them to, but tears welled in her eyes.

"I love you far more than any words could ever convey." Answer enough, if the love that filled his features was anything to say about it. He leaned down and pecked a kiss on her lips before turning around to see Rhys and Feyre stepping down the stairs.

"Look at you two lovebirds! Maybe we should just stay home." Rhysand said, smiling at the two of them.

Annona looked through slanted eyes and couldn't hold back the slight bite from her words as she said, "Says the High Lord and Lady of the Night Court who are married mates."

She didn't even understand what she was saying until she'd said it; the most unfiltered thing she had ever spoken in front of her High Lady. She knew she wasn't an envious person, but right now the only thing she wanted was for Cassian to accept their bond. Maybe she was just feeling jealousy.

There was a stunned silence for a moment where the three of them looked at her and blinked. She gestured to the door behind her. "It's been a long day and I'm starving," she said as an explanation.

Rhys was the first person to react, smirking and nodding he said, "If you're ever wondering, Feyre, what our kind and humble Ann was like before she married Cassian—there she is."

Annona bowed with a flourish, a smirk pulling her lips up. "Pleased to make your acquaintance." When she straightened and saw Feyre's eyebrows raised, she added, "Having thousands of people looking up to you and watching your every move makes you rethink some things, as you are probably finding out."

A dip of the chin showed that Feyre indeed understood what Annona meant. Rhys raised his eyebrows and she could see him trying to understand, but he was born knowing he would one day rule the largest Court of Prythian. He never had to deal with the new rush of attention or respect—he'd always had that.


	11. Chapter Eleven

The snow slowed the longer they walked through the steep streets of Velaris towards the Palace of Bone and Salt where this new restaurant was. Annona kept the majority of snow out of her face and off of Cassian's wings with help of her magic. She had learned a while ago that Rhys liked to feel the snow on his wings and he had to like it even more now after not being able to have his wings out for fifty years.

Every block someone was stopping Annona to ask her how she was doing and how her mother was faring with the death of her husband. All of them were super respectful and if Annona started to stumble over her words, Rhysand or Cassian would step in with something.

Feyre spoke with others, asking if they needed help with anything and Annona jumped in, offering her help if they would need it, getting back into the headspace of being their princess.

Rhysand noticed how much she was stumbling and started up conversations for her to continue, guiding her back to her feet. At some points, he even finished up a conversation early for her by jumping in and changing the subject so discreetly Annona hardly even noticed what he was doing.

All the while Cassian was watching her. He wasn't doing it obviously, but she saw his eyes on her out of the corner of her view. His face was drawn, his eyes shadowed but full of love.

She wanted to come out and ask what was wrong and work through it, but not now. Not while they were outside in Velaris enjoying their High Lord and Lady's company and speaking to the people they served. There would always be tonight.

Turning into the Palace, Cassian wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her close. No one approached them here, though some looked over and smiled and waved as they passed.

Music played through the square and voices were carried on the tune, lilting and humming, joyful and sorrow-filled. She cataloged each note played and word sung, catching on and humming to a song she had written hundreds of years ago before she'd even met Cassian. Whoever was playing it probably didn't know it was written by their Princess a whole lifetime ago.

"Did you write that one?" Rhysand asked, gesturing with a hand to the complicated piece of full of life and joy they had paused in front of.

The head singer, a soft-faced brown-haired High Fae, had looked to Annona as soon as she'd walked up. They were old friends—had acted together and had long nights of drinking and singing together. It was no surprise she was singing one of the songs she'd written.

"It is," Annona said, a smile pulling her lips up. "I wrote it right after Cassian and I got engaged."

His arm tightened around her waist and she could see him spacing out as he got lost in the music and listened to every lyric now knowing he was listening to his wife's emotions. The song played and turned and hit its high then slowly came to a finish.

The singer bowed to Annona, a playful smirk on her lips and jumped into another song. Another song Annona had written.

"You should be paying me for singing all my songs!" Annona called and though the girl didn't look over she knew they heard, especially when their delicate hand formed into a vulgar gesture held low at their waist directed solely to the princess.

Cassian burst out into a roaring laugh and Rhys joined in. Annona looked to Feyre and they smiled at each other before launching into a fit of laughter.

"Old friend?" Cassian asked over the last bubbles of laughter, guiding everyone away from the singer towards the new restaurant.

"Old friendly rival," Annona said, grinning, as Cassian stopped in front of a store, a banner saying "grand opening" painted elegantly onto it.

The front was made out of glass panels, showing the many people sitting inside at tables full of four or more, laughing as they spoke to each other over plates of meat. A thin woman with a head of messy brown hair came up to the door and pulled it open, a pride-filled smile on her lips as she looked at the four of them.

"Are you guys here to eat?" she asked, hope filling her eyes. Annona nodded, care filling her chest to see her people so joyful and prideful of things they've worked so hard on.

"Of course. Is there even room?" Annona asked, and the woman's eyes widened and she could almost feel how happy she was.

"Yes, yes! Always for you guys," she said and gestured inside. "Come on in,"

She quickly ushered them inside and brought them to a six-person table near the front and the cushioned chairs were made for wings, as was every other chair in the restaurant. The four of them sat down, Feyre and Annona swinging their coats onto the back of their chairs, and asked for a bottle of wine and whatever she recommended as food. Her tan skin had seemed to glow out of happiness as she bowed and rushed into the back.

People spoke quietly as they shoved wonderfully smelling spiced chicken and drank deep-colored wines. A group of people at one of the tables broke out into laughs that they were trying to hind behind hands.

A bottle of wine appeared on the center of the table followed by glasses appearing in front of each of them. Rhysand let out a surprised hum as he picked up the bottle and poured Feyre and himself a glass leaving Cassian to pour Annona and himself one.

Annona took a sip of it, letting the strangely floral taste of it run smoothly down her throat. She looked outside to see Amren meandering by all stuffed in a furry coat, her dark hair stark against the brightness of the snow.

"I'll be right back," Annona said pushing her chair back so she could stand. Cassian raised his eyebrows and looked out to Amren and looked back with a look of confusion and a bit of amusement.

"Invite her to join!" Rhys called after her and she waved at him before she charged into the cold outside. With the lack of a coat, she guided her magic to create a second skin and keep what heat her body was emitting to keep her from freezing.

"Amren!" Annona called and the small woman turned, the absence of the spark in her eyes surprisingly jarring. A slash of red as she smiled, stuffing her hands in the pocket of her coat.

"How can I help, girl," she said, a dark eyebrow raising. Annona nearly never spoke to Amren, partially out of fear, partially because they never really had anything to speak about so this had to be shocking for her.

"I have a question," she said, wrapping her arms around her center.

"And why am I the one you're coming to?" she said, a bite following her words.

Annona just went on with the question, changing to speak in a very lyrical and soft language that she only knew Amren spoke to avoid anyone else listening in, "Can someone truly have two mates?"

Because only Amren would know. She was the oldest person Annona knew, and she feels that in a polite way. If any one of her friends would be able to confirm it, it would be Amren.

Amren's eyebrows rose in confusion at the switching of the language, but she shrugged. A short indecisive move. For a moment she thought she wasn't going to continue, but she did, switching the language as well. "It's possible. Why?"

Annona just tilted her head towards the restaurant and Cassian sitting inside. Amren looked over and Cassian waved, beckoning them to come in.

A feral grin cut onto Amren's face as she looked back at Annona. She snorted and started into the restaurant, Annona hurrying after her.

They got inside and Amren stared Cassian down as she sat down beside Rhysand. Summoning her a glass, she filled it with the dark wine and took a long drag of it. Annona took a sip of her wine as Cassian started up a conversation with Rhys about going out after dinner to Rita's.

Just as Annona took another sip of her wine, Amren cut in with that other language, "Of course it would be you, the Mother-Gifted princess to have a _vrai lien_."

Annona coughed, sending wine spewing from her nose. Cassian jerked back and cursed softly, raising his eyebrows as he looked to Amren. Rhys and Feyre both raised their eyebrows, looking between Annona and Amren.

"You truly are cruel," Annona said, staying in that other language as she stood up and summoned a towel to wipe up the spilled wine.

"So you don't want to know what it is?" Amren asked smoothly, leaning back in the chair and flinging off her coat. Annona scowled at her—for ruining the lovely lace tablecloth.

"I already know, true link," she said, giving up on cleaning the white lace and waved her hand to make the splatter of red disappear. She sat down and switched back to her native tongue as she said, "You didn't have to be so frank about it."

Cassian's eyebrows shot to his hairline, his eyes darting between the two of them with genuine amusement in his eyes. Her chest tightened at it.

"What did you want? A nicely written note slipped into your pockets?" she said and Annona shrugged, throwing the cloth she attempted to clean the table with in front of her.

"That would've been better than whatever that was." She said and Rhys smirked with a large amount of confusing amusement filling his eyes.

"And what exactly was that, precious Amren?" Rhysand asked, his voice low and sensual as he braced his arm on the table. Amren's steely gaze landed on Annona and the other three eyes switched to her. She felt like she was being accused of something, not by the others, but by Amren who had a mirthful smirk on her red lips.

So, with no way to escape it, Annona said in that strange other language, "Cassian is my mate and is my true link which is a bond deeper than that of any mates and is far rarer. One in a million."

Cassian blinked at Annona, took a long sip of wine, and muttered under his breath, "I need to learn that stupid language."


End file.
